redeemed

2012-01-20T10:57:00.001-05:00

Yes, I'm feeling totally lazy and tired right now. And I'm also feeling like my list should be a lot longer by now.
But here's the next installment in my list, in a big jumble because I'm too tired to number each one. :-)

# 435 - 482:

The beauty of homeschooling = knowing my girl does better when she can talk it out, math on the couch, great spelling apps, calm, amazing church leaders, freedom to disagree, people gathering to help those in need, song lyrics that move me, completed chores, funny typos, baby snuggles, smiley Lauren, soft tissues, fresh grace every morning (or every moment), why we need vacations - big girls and daddy dates, watching Addie walk, naps, rowdy dinnertime fun, relaxing, early mornings with my baby, a house full of friends, a sparkling Christmas tree, anticipation for celebrations to come, memories of her living with us, the bible I sent her when they found cancer, her years of life afterwards, my Aunt Cindy, excitement over new "butter" for my allergy girl, fog lifting over the back field, rearranged furniture, slow mornings when I'm tired, a visit with my parents, peeking in the windows of Amish school with my mom, tears as they leave knowing my girls love their nana & papa,hot apple cider k-cups, good recipes, being honest and knowing I won't be judged harshly, autumn leaves,pink long johns on my baby, Rosy cheeks on my girls after bike rides, sad & disappointing days that turn out ok, watching football with hubs, rainy Sundays, early morning happiness, Lauren's guitar playing, sniffly noses keeping us tucked in at home, autumn decorations, marking one year ago that my blueish baby was whisked off my chest and celebrating her chubby,sweet 1st birthday.

Flakes

2012-01-05T08:53:00.001-05:00

It's snowing. The nice, floaty kind of snow that looks perfect falling on the fields that surround our house. It's the kind of snow we all wished for every day of December but never got. Better late than never?

I've been pondering lots of things lately....

Jesus threw the money changers out of the temple, right? (Matthew 21) They were polluting His temple, His holy place so he kicked them to the curb. Why don't we ever do this in our homes and lives? The money changers in the temple were disrupting and detracting from the work of God in that place. Do we have people that have set up shop in our lives that disrupt the work of God? I'm not saying we shouldn't love those people, don't get me wrong. But there is a big difference between loving and serving people and them letting them run our lives. We let toxic people into our homes and our hearts with the idea that we can change them. But really, only God can change them. We can be examples of holiness and grace even as we say "my God and family are the most important thing to me, I need to focus on that." That is the example toxic people need to see - women who are not afraid to stand up for what is most important in their lives. Why do we, as women, think its holy to do everything for everyone? I don't think that is what God mind for us. But I'm still chewing on this one.

I need self control. Desperately. A lack of self control is the root cause of every issue in my life. The lack of self control is making me see how badly I need more of God, more of the fruit that should be coming from my life.

Menu planning is one of the things I love and hate all at the same time. Trying to eat healthy (very limited white sugar and flour, lean meats, more veggies, beans and legumes) while also finding ways to cook things so one dinner can feed all of us is a challenge. Most low-GI or low-carb recipes have either cheese or eggs in them. Our beautiful Alyssa cannot eat cheese or eggs. It took me all afternoon yesterday to get it figured out. Then top that with a budget I'm desperately trying to stick to. I found an app that keeps track of prices for me so as I'm writing my menu and adding items to my grocery list, it adds it all up. I'm hoping it helps a bit with that whole self control thing...

clouds and logs

2011-11-15T11:07:00.001-05:00

I went for a walk yesterday morning, even though it was overcast and threatening rain. It was just one of those mornings where I needed peace for just a moment. Trials and a death in the family and bickering children and a new "diet" plan with hubby ..... I really just needed peace.

As I walked home, I looked up and noticed that the clouds were moving quickly over the sun. The homeschool mom in me quickly corrected that thought and remembered that it's actually me that's moving quickly. This earth, this road, this dirt I was standing on is moving so quickly, always. Why do we blame it on the clouds?

Hmmm.
The kids are so cranky, I can't take it.
I'm so busy, time is just flying by.
No one talks to me. I have no friends.
I can't believe she's wearing that.
This house is always a mess.

I'm blaming everyone but me for the struggles in my life. Just like I blame the clouds for moving too quickly over the sun. It's me, it's this earth that is doing the moving.

Am I being kind and gentle with my words?
Am I pausing to enjoy the simple moments?
Am I reaching out to others?
Am I being modest and respectful with my clothing?
Am I serving my family and being a good steward of what I've been given?

"Hypocrite! First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye." Matthew 7:5

Muffin yumminess

2011-10-05T09:26:00.001-04:00

We needed a warm pick-me-up during school the other day. So I flipped through my handy dandy More With Less Cookbook. of course, I found a great recipe and they quickly pulled together into a yummy snack.

Cinnamon-topped Oatmeal Muffins

Preheat oven to 425*

Mix:
1 c. flour
1/4 c. sugar
3 t. baking powder
1/2 t. salt

Add in:
1 c. oats (I used old-fashioned but you can use quick oats)
1/2 c. raisins
3 T. oil
1 egg, beaten
1 c. milk

Stir just until all ingredients are moistened. Fill greased muffin tins 2/3 of the way full and sprinkle with cinnamon topping :

2T. sugar
2 t. flour
1 t. cinnamon
1 t. melted butter

Make for 15 minutes. Makes about a dozen muffins.

When I made the topping, it was more of a paste. It cooked down into the muffins rather than creating a crusty top
Ing but they were still delicious.

Enjoy!

hearing

2011-09-29T10:45:00.002-04:00

I've been crabby lately. Not just a little snippy but really crabby and rotten. There are things that are out of my control causing me to feel stressed and stressed leads to crabby which eventually leads to angry. not fun.

When I'm feeling stressed, it's hard for me to hear God. I know He's still there but it's the hearing part I struggle with. Some people would say that it's okay for me to be a little crabby when I feel out of control or while I'm dealing with hard issues.

I have told me it's okay. I have told me to go ahead and wallow in it. And God's Word would tell me that my words and thoughts should be sweet.

May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart
be pleasing in your sight, LORD, my Rock and my Redeemer. Psalm 19:14

I can't find those pleasing words sometimes when Addie is trying her new screechy voice. And Lauren is singing "Hosanna in the Highest" for the 3,000 time. Or Lael and Alyssa barreling through the house asking to call for a friend or go for a bike ride. Sometimes, I just have to find quiet to hear God again and find my peace.

I go here. And I can hear and see God's promises again of care, peace and a hope.

The only sounds are the noise of my sneakers sloshing on the muddy dirt road. (399)

The multitudes of birds, frogs and bugs all singing their God-given song. (400)

The rattle of an Amish work buggy driving by with a quiet hello from the driver. (401)

Hearing my own breath, in and out, louder as I go up the hill. How many times each day can I just hear my own breath as it's own gift from God? (402)

The smell of woods and fields after a soaking night rain. (403)

from my twitter...

404 holding my baby while her
daddy sleeps close by and praying for Gina, the youngest widow I've ever known.

405 trusting God to bring peace

406 messy counters

407 scattered toys

408 full garbage cans

409 the little hands that create such messes

410 crisp mornings

411 a return to routine

412 cheap bushels of tomatoes

413 fresh vision

414 baby snuggles

415 my girls are piled in one bed

416 good deals on a quick shopping trip

417 watching the baby love her sisters

418 seeing a vision come to fruition

419 time to let hubby nap

420 productive mornings

421 exhausted but blessed with another day

422 sister-friends off for a bike ride

423 giving gifts just because

424 rewarding good behavior

425 beautiful blogs from faraway friends

426 being able to pray for the things I can't fix

427 knowing that He is still in control

428 my big girl's first from-scratch apple pie

429 rearranged rooms

430 opportunities for sister bonding

431 my sewing table, set in it's own little nook

432 seeing a very fashionable friend while wandering TJMaxx

433 hubby saying yes

434 a bag of new clones that don't look like anything I already own.

Review: Well Planned Day iPad version

2011-09-22T10:30:00.001-04:00

With much anticipation, I recently purchased the iPad version of the Well Planned Day homeschool planner. I've used the printed version twice and loved it. First the pros...

First, to use this version you must buy a PDF app. It was about 10 dollars and was not included in the price of the planner. Once everything downloads (which was quick and easy), you can open each month within the PDF app. There isn't an icon on my iPad for Well Planned Day. It's an icon for the PDF app. Once opened, the planner looks exactly like the printed version. I like that it's still beautiful to look at, well laid out and functional. It still has all the pages that make it a fantastic planner. I also like that I don't have to make each thing an assignment. I don't have to give them a due date. I just type them in, like I would write it into the printed planner. (There are a couple of other school planner apps but they are more for teachers. Each assignment has to have a due date or a class it is assigned to.)

But.

I was really looking forward to a planner that would include a few necessary capabilities. First, the ability to sync my Google calendar with my homeschool calendar. This is key for me and the day I find a homeschool planner for my iPad that can do this I will throw a party. Second, the ability to sync to my iPhone. Third, having a copy or repeat feature for assignments. And last, I was disappointed that the price was the same for the iPad version as the printed version. Granted I did get a coupon code for half off but with the ten dollar app added in, the cost was exactly the same.

So all in all, it's an okay vesion. I appeciate that I have one less book to copy dates and appointments into. But overall, I was disappointed that what was touted as an iPad app isn't really an app at all. Hopefully by next year, Well Planned Day has a real iPad app.

There is a month-at-a-glance page at the beginning of each monthly section.

To type in the planner, you tap and hold down you finger. A black caption box (shown above) pops up. From there you can type, highlight, edit, etc.

You can change the color and size of the font to add emphasis to certain things. I like this feature.

There are still shopping list pages included. It seems foolish to me at first because you can't tear them out. But I've found it to be a great spot for jotting things down as I remember that I need them.

map tablecloth

2011-08-20T16:45:00.006-04:00

We are doing Exploration to 1850 this year for history. The curriculum really requires access to a world and US map. Our globe broke and we have no where to hang a map on the wall.

what to do?

Lael told me a teacher at CFA had once said she glued a map to the underside of a clear tablecloth. HHmmmmm.... Sounded like a good idea to me! Turns out it was the easiest project ever. We now have a sturdy plastic tablecloth to protect the table as well as easy access to a world map as well as a US map.

I purchased a large clear tablecover, a World & US wall map set and clear Elmer's glue.

First step, spread the whole plastic cloth out and line up the maps up the way you want them. Our table is large enough that we could have both maps shown at once.

Glue like crazy on the map side, then carefully flip it over so the map side is down. I used my rolling pin to flatten out the map to the plastic.

Then I left the tablecloth out on the floor to dry for awhile.

And voila!

A tablecloth map. Or map tablecloth? Either way for about $10 I have a super useful, easy to store homeschool tool.

Homeschool organization

2011-08-15T15:29:00.005-04:00

We are starting in on another year of homeschooling this week. Lael is going into 5th grade, if that's even possible, Alyssa into 3rd and Lauren is doing preschool work. My organization of our books has become more and more simplistic over the years. Especially with living in a rental house (a wonderful, spacious house!), I had to make this space work for us.

In the kitchen, we have this awesome shelving unit. It's super sturdy and hefty enough for lots of books. On it, I keep all our textbooks and teacher's manuals as well as our chore card file box.

Each girl has a color-coordinated bin for their school books and supplies. Their workbooks, binders, notebooks, pencil boxes, art supplies and the like are kept in their bin. I color coordinate as much as possible. Pencils, sharpeners, scissors, pencil boxes, binders and anything else I think they might need for school that I can find in the right colors. Lael's bin is in her room near her desk where she does her work. (um yeah. she has a football in her bin. not sure why) Lauren and Alyssa have their bins in the dining room, under our phone table.

For my stuff, I put it all in this basket next to the phone table. It's my MFW teacher's manual, the books I'm currently reading, magazines and sale fliers I want to read, my coupon folder, envelopes, the little notebook where I keep all our bulk order information and the lint brush. (Because, really you need to know where the lint brush at all times.)

It's not a fancy classroom with pretty posters on the wall but it's working well for us. I like that school just happens in our house, where ever we might be. And these pics are from the first day, after I spent the morning organizing the chores and books. They won't be this neat by the end of the week. :-)

Chore organization

2011-08-15T14:47:00.005-04:00

If you don't have little kids, this may be a very boring post. Sorry :)
I thought I'd write up a couple of posts about our daily organization. This one is about our chores. A few months ago, we started with the envelope system of chore organization. It's definitely not unique to us or new and fancy! But I like that it clearly shows me what's been done, who still has work to do and who is responsible for what.

This is our board. Don't mind the crooked picture. I'm physically unable to take straight pics for some reason. Each girl has an envelope for AM chores, PM chores and completed chores.

I sat down with the girls and figured out what chores I wanted done each day, each week, etc. We also have a card for Saturday chores - monthly cleaning tasks I rotate through.

Every morning (or if I'm really with it, the evening before) I'll put each girls' cards in the proper envelopes. We also have an envelope for "Daddy cards." No, I didn't give Josh a chore list. These are cards for each girl listing how she is doing with the character traits she struggles with. Josh checks them periodically to issue rewards or punishments if needed.
I keep all the cards in a file box on our school shelf. Each girl has divided section with cards already separated for Monday-Saturday. There is no flipping through to find the right card, it's all presorted. This was a lot of writing when I first did them but it was definitely worth it.

Here is a list of what chores each girl does:

Lael (age 10)
5 Fingers (get dressed, put dirty clothes in hamper, make bed, brush teeth, brush hair)
alternating breakfast and lunch prep with Alyssa
feed Max
sweep
put away lunch dishes
practice guitar
quick clean living room with Lauren
quick clean bedroom
pick up outside toys
wash dinner dishes
laundry - M, Th
daily chore - M,W, F
Saturday chore

Alyssa (almost 8)
5 fingers
alternating breakfast and lunch prep with Lael
put away dinner dishes
school clean-up
wash lunch dishes
quick clean bedroom with Lauren
pick up outside toys
dinner clean up
laundry - T, F
daily chore - T, Th, Sat.
Saturday chore

Lauren (age 4)
5 fingers
put away utensils
dust
quick clean toy area
quick clean bedroom with Alyssa
quick clean living room with Lael
wipe dining room table after dinner
Saturday chore

His Love endures

2011-08-01T08:10:00.002-04:00

374 organizing with my hubby

375 beautiful summer days

376 nothing to do

377 abundance

378 invitations

379 air conditioning

380 peekaboo with Addie

381 funny tweets that show I'm not the only nutty one in the world

382 a bored daughter who bakes chocolate chip cookie bars

383 safe and snuggly girls during a thunderstorm

384 baby screeches of joy

385 two glorious hours of uninterrupted sleep

386 my choleric girl taking time to organize my closet

387 then taking her sister for a walk

388 and then helping with lunch even though it's not "her" chore

389 friends who get me

390 no pressure to be what I'm not

391 honesty

392 evening chats with the hubs

393 a clean dining room table

394 Mondays - a fresh start to a new week

395 quick er visits

396 no broken bones

397 Sundays to rest and regroup

398 counting down to the first day or school

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A year ago we were still in the midst of transition after selling our home. People have commented on our family's attitude while living in that little (LITTLE) white house. It's by God's grace that we didn't go crazy. Now we are in a great house and location so that we can do what we wanted to do from the beginning ... Take our time in clearing and prepping our land, take time to make choices for our house that will be cost effective and beneficial not just now but 30 years from now and then take our time building the house. It is so nice to not feel rushed or pressured.

Addie is 10 months old today. She is following in Lauren's footsteps so far and is the sweetest, happiest baby you can imagine. And just like Lauren, sleeping is not her favorite pastime. I'm sure she will catch on eventually, I just have to stay awake until then.

Lauren is growing by leaps and bounds in her abilities at the pool. She likes to dunk and jump and swim like a little fish. She is also excited to start some preschool work this fall.

Alyssa is our biggest helper with Addie. She is definitely a great babysitter in training. Alyssa also had a sleepover with her best friend. It's the first time she has spent a night away from me or my mom to watch over her food choices. I was petrified that I'd receive a phone call telling me she had eaten something she shouldn't. But I didn't of course and she had a great time.

Lael is 10 and wanting more and more freedoms. She takes bike rides up the dirt road near our house by herself and has had her share of sleepovers as well. Lael would also live at the pool or at the beach if we let her. She LOVES to swim.

I confess that I'm wishing summer away already. It's been a hot summer and I'm not a hot weather kinda gal. Also I think it has to do with the fact that I like routine and order. Until we moved here in March, there was little routine that was maintained. We settled into this house quickly and routine was easily established. It seemed like just as quickly as we fell into that routine, we finished school and routine went out the window. I'm ready for it again. That's not to say we have no routine during summer. Morning chores are happening as I type and there has been a good flow to our days. But I'm ready for pencils and books again.

The fact that we are returning to my favorite curriculum isn't helping my patience with summer days. My Father's World is a great Bible-based unit study curriculum that we've used in the past. This year we will be doing early American history which is also a favorite of mine. The books are all here waiting for us. So yes. I'm counting the days. August 22 can't come soon enough.

because He is good

2011-07-15T09:48:00.002-04:00

355 The Adirondack Mountains -- lakes and ponds smooth like glass, trees glittering with morning dew, majestic pines, fog lifting between the peaks

356 the best Hubby ever, loading us up at 5 am to surprise my dad for the weekend (even though my mom told him)

357 rides and fireworks on my brother's boat

358 swimming in the river with my girls

359 comfy rooms waiting for us at my parents house

360 a weekend away

361 days spent being lazy at the beach

362 friends with new babies

363 Pine Sol

364 summer rain showers

365 sharing hobbies with my Hubby

366 giggling friends

367 more beach days

368 VBS

369 good hairdressers

370 teaching my girls to swim

371 LE sandals for $5.99

372 Shout stain remover

373 fresh veggies grown in my backyard

and on and on

2011-06-29T08:30:00.003-04:00

301 "You say I am blessed because of this so i choose to believe" ~ audrey assad

302 'windy' the pooh, as Lauren says

303 giggling sisters

304 ice water

305 bedtime

306 baby breath on my cheek

307 extra pacifiers

308 oil changes

309 farmer's market

310 my happy-Alyssa carrying her AG doll

311 not having to cook dinner

312 baby-daddy adoration

313 a gorgeous evening despite what the forecast says

314 my birthday shared with my big girl

315 surprises from my hubby

316 friends who keep secrets and step in to help

317 good thrift stores

318 the whole family working on our land

319 little girls in a bubble bath

320 healthy girls who can once again help with chores

321 patience

322 good customer service

323 lists

324 plans for fun days with my girls

325 everyone being ready on time!

326 forgiveness

327 love

328 chocolate

329 fireflies

330 the best day with my big girl

331 watching her giggle and chat with her BFF

332 coming home to hubby's bbq'ed ribs

333 awesome field trips with friends

334 a balsam pillow

335 nighttime peace

336 raisin bran with ice cold milk

337 a Mennonite store less than 30 minutes away

338 cheap raw sugar

339 Deanna

340 garbage men who empty our stinky trash

341 the beautiful sounds of the country in the morning

342 a little bit of time to go back to sleep

343 Amish neighbors who grow delicious strawberries

344 my big girl, going off with friends and knowing she'll have a great time

345 popcorn for dinner

346 the smell of clean, country air on our evening walk

347 counting down the days to our weekend away with Lauren

348 cheap van repairs (even the hundredth time)

349 Lauren bring everyone drinks without being asked

350 sitting with hubby while he grills

351 happy girls, swimming with friends

352 guests, planned and unplanned from near and far

353 the smell of sunblock on my baby's head

354 awarding new freedoms to my big girls

the book

2011-06-09T11:11:00.003-04:00

I've been doing my list of 1,000 gifts for awhile now. It all started with Ann's blog. Do you know Ann? I don't either but after reading her blog for years, it's easy to feel like you really know someone.

Then I read her book. the book. It's one of those books that you want to buy for everyone you know and say "please stop everything you're doing for the afternoon and read this entire book."

It's that good, that life changing, that encouraging, a beautiful push closer to God and what He wants for us. So I've been trying to keep my list going on a more regular basis. I don't have a pretty journal to write it in. I like to keep it online so maybe it could be an encouragement to someone else. (I grab my phone and tweet my list regularly, if you'd like to follow I'm here.) Then once a week or so, I transfer the list onto here to keep my list organized.

This isn't the easiest season for me to overflow with thankfulness. Things happen and in the grand scheme of life, our challenges are not great or mighty. But sometimes it hurts more to step on a small pebble that a huge boulder. Those little rocks hurt your feet bad and the little challenges are draining. So I turn again to thankfulness, to stir up and remind myself that God is good. I am blessed. And seasons change.

274 walks with the whole family, even when Hubs doesn't feel well

275 a moment to snuggle my sleepy baby

276 coupons

277 the library

278 creative girls

279 good curriculum

280 Friday afternoons

281 good greenhouses

282 truckers who take a moment to honk their horn for my girls

283 brew-over-ice kcups

284 wind chimes

285 the big blue sky

286 sick babies that aren't that sick

287 a morning at home

288 Hubs taking the girls on an errand with him

289 flowers

290 carpet cleaner

291 sun, warm on my legs

292 rhubarb from a generous neighbor

293 good books

294 a Hubs who makes good choices (even when it means i don't get an iPhone 4)

295 the slow meander into summer

296 Amish, plowing up the field across the road

297 old married couples

298 homeschoolclassifieds

299 a pool next door

300 the wonderful neighbors who let us use that pool

Memorial Day weekend

2011-05-30T22:08:00.003-04:00

267 Figuring out twitter

268 Our faith-step one year ago this weekend - house sold, moving slowly towards our dream

269 Small town parades

270 an elderly man's gentleness towards his fragile wife

271 a butterfly floating overhead as Taps is played through the village green

272 freedom

273 knowing that no matter what the next step may be, He is there.

And it will be good.

listing gifts

2011-05-29T08:11:00.003-04:00

251 peanut butter and jelly

252 a break in the clouds

253 Amish trotting up the road

254 baby toes

255 new benches at the table

256 freshly bathed babies

257 long weekends

258 chore charts

259 muddy feet

260 the smell of new books

261 the 2011 Local Food Guide

262 bread and butter pickles

263 the last two pine candles on a rainy day

264 milano cookies

265 maple coffee

266 thunder, lightning and safety

continuing the circle...

2011-05-26T07:16:00.002-04:00

239 sun on my face

240 dirt on my hands

241 the chirps of a million birds

242 waves from friends who are also neighbors

243 happy girls catching frogs

244 the promise of growth - both in me and my garden

245 wise women who take time for me

246 beautiful country roads

247 sleep

248 honesty about the hard things

249 being the first to see a friend's much-anticipated area rug

250 sore muscles that make me feel alive

early morning rambles

2011-04-17T06:25:00.005-04:00

I've been up since 5:30. That's not terribly early for a lot of people but it's early for me lately. My sweetest-baby-ever Addison has not been sleeping well. Or really sleeping at all. But yesterday I realized she had another tooth that popped through her little gums and last night she sleep wonderfully.
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New chore charts have been created and new chores along with them. We now have a mini Command Central in the kitchen. The weekly menu is posted on a chalkboard, with everyone's chores listed underneath on index cards. Everyone has a morning and an afternoon envelope, as well as a "done" envelope for their cards. Its a pretty popular system around here and I now see why. Everything is so clearly organized for each girl. I even have cards listing the proper way to complete each job. It did take me quite awhile to write everything out but I think it will be worth it in the end. Each girl has some new chores and lots of old ones. I'm trying to slowly work myself out of the household work. No, I'm not trying to raise up little slave workers. I want my daughters to know what it is to run a home. Whether they become career women or at-home moms, they will need to know all the little tasks and big tasks that need to happen each day in order to keep a house running smoothly. My main job now will be to check their work.
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I had my wisdom teeth taken out this past Friday. My cheeks are puffy and my jaw aches but besides that I'm doing fine. After reading some horror stories of people who were in terrible pain for days, I was nervous that I'd really be down and out for the weekend. Thankfully, my pain is not that bad and I really like applesauce.

While I was waiting for my mouth to numb in the dentist's chair, I read through the first 2 chapters of James. This seemed like a much better use of my time than falling asleep, which is what I did while I was waiting to get some fillings repaired last week. I'm sure I'm not the first person to fall asleep at the dentist but it was still a little embarrassing. So I read James instead. I reread it this morning to stir up once again the words that struck me as so profound.

Know this my beloved brothers: let every man be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. James 1:19-20 ESV

Slow to speak. Yes, that would solve a lot of problems wouldn't it? Get that filter working, slow your big mouth down and think about what you're saying before all the venom comes flying out. I need that thought with me daily. Isn't it so like our God to give us such easy instructions? Slow to speak. How many issues would we find we could avoid if we could just slow down, think, pray and then speak?

------------------------------------------

My time reading the Bible and praying is not one for the record books right now. It's a very busy season for us that I think is starting to develop a routine, finally. That gives me hope that I might be able to carve out more than 5 minutes to read His Word each day. I've been at this awhile now. I want to know more and to be a changed person, one who demonstrates God's heart in every situation. It seems like I should be "getting it" more by now. God is so unendingly patient with me, it's unfathomable. Still the same struggles, still the same highs and lows...but yet when I need Him, He's there. Not like the wild winds that are flinging angry rain at my windows right now but like a calm, gentle breeze.

yes, there is enough grace. yes i forgive you. yes i will help you.
peace. unending peace.

What I've been up to:

2011-04-06T10:52:00.003-04:00

-- Getting my newest gadget set up the way I like it. There are some really creative people that have made some amazing apps. My favorites so far? Bible.Is (I have this on my iPhone and iPad. The girls love to listen to the dramatic readings, they are really good.) Allrecipes, Epicurious, kidpaint and Montessorium (both of which are on sale for $.99 right now). The girls love it just as much as I do. My current search is for a good homeschool planning app...

-- Looking into our curriculum choices for next year. Now that Addie is set in a decent nap routine, I'm ready to get back to a more Charlotte Mason based curriculum for history and science. The front runners right now are Beautiful Feet for history with Apologia for science and My Father's World Exploration to 1850. I'm definitely doing early American history but as for which curriculum would be a better fit for us - I'm torn. We're also switching math for both girls and language/spelling for Alyssa.

-- Battling cloth diaper and rash issues. I'm trying to determine what's causing the stink in our diapers and if that is the cause of Addie's diaper rash. Our front loader washer is on it's last leg and leaking water terribly. I really wanted this washer to last for a few more months but it doesn't look like that's going to happen. Anyone selling a used top loader?

-- Trying to get a chore schedule going again. not succeeding.

-- Cleaning in hopes of stopping the dreaded stomach bug at Lauren. She is her usual bouncy self this morning and I'm hoping to eliminate the germs quickly.

-- Organizing our closet. As usual, our master bedroom closet became the catch-all during this last move. I finally got it cleaned out, organized and some winter clothes put away.

-- Enjoying baking and cooking again.

-- Watching the snow fly. Yes, it's snowing right now.

The lion is here

2011-03-21T15:59:00.003-04:00

-- it's a very March kind of day today. This morning, we had a snow storm and all of our beautiful March mud was covered in white once again. Now, it raining steadily, all the white is gone and we're back to brown everywhere. I like brown.

-- we have moved again. Since selling our house, things have been very up-in-the-air for our family. We just kept going one day at a time, waiting to see what the Lord would bring. As usual, what God had for us was so much better than what we would have planned. We are now living less than a half mile from our property, surrounded by good friends but in our own little spot so our girls can start to feel like we live in the country like we have always wanted. The house is a great size and our backyard is massive. The ultimate goal is still building our dream house but while we walk that out, our family is so comfortable. It fits right into our plan for a stress-free build, taking our time to make decisions slowly and save money. I could never have imagined that we could live this close and be in such a great space at the same time. The Lord is so good to us.

-- my baby is quickly approaching 6 months old. She rolls all over the place, grabs food out of our hands, screeches for attention and smiles at anyone who looks at her. She is such a sweet baby. The whole sleeping thing hasn't really come to her yet but I'm sure she will get the hang of it eventually.

-- I'm freshly aware of my imperfections as a mother. I'm also freshly aware of God's grace for those imperfections. There is nothing like mercy.

Comparing

2011-03-08T07:01:00.003-05:00

A friend recently posted a list of mommy confessions -a list of all the ways she feels like she doesn't measure up. It reminds me of the years I spend in a similar state of mind - sure that I was the only mom in my church who ever _______. Everyone else was surely better than me at keeping home, raising children and being pleasant. I was quick to put on the happy face any time we were out in public. I'm sure no one knew anything of the storm raging under the surface. But it was raging. I hated that I couldn't measure up.

Until I came to a point where I began to realize there was no measuring up. Are other moms better at not losing their temp? Probably. Are other moms better at staying on schedule or keeping their house clean? I'm sure of it! But who's standard was I trying to live up to anyway? Martha Stewart? (I'm sorry, Martha, I love you but you run way too tight of a ship for me.) Ma Ingalls? Who exactly? Where is the standard written? Where is the "normal" mom explained?

I don't want to live up to the standard of some pretty lady on television or the perfect church mom. The tv lady has lots of helpers. The perfect church mom? For all you know, shes crying herself to sleep at night because she's so tired of trying to hold it all together.

Why we do moms keep it all hidden? Doesn't the Bible say to confess our sins, one to another? How will we know how to pray for one another if we don't admit to our struggles and shortcomings? I may not be great at it yet but I'm trying to be transparent, to let the daily struggles show. If you don't see the struggles, you don't see my desperate need for grace and mercy every day.

We can't judge one another based on what we read on blogs or Facebook. Its not reality. Reality is your life. The more you worry about how other people are living their life, the less you're going to worry about who you're living your life for. I'm not living my life so I can measure up or be the cool mom. I'm living my life so other can see that God can save a sinning wretch with His unending grace.

I just want to be able to end each day and pray, ask the Lord for forgiveness and trust that His mercies will be new in the morning. I want to begin each day, knowing that I'm going to try and mess up and try again because that's all my God asks -that I trust Him and keep trying. And HE is who I'm living for, HIS standard is the one that matters.

I want to be humble enough to know that no matter how hard I try, I won't have it all together. Will I try to be better, to love more, to serve selflessly, to be a good wife, mother, steward of all I've been given? Of course. But when I fail -and I will - I won't look to the moms who've got it all or the tv lady, I'll look to Jesus. For mercy, for forgiveness and for grace to try one more time that He gives so willingly.

Tees

2011-02-25T15:05:00.002-05:00

Have you heard of Wild Olive Tees? No? Check them out!

Today's beauty

2011-02-10T15:40:00.006-05:00

I'm reading this book. When I first picked it up, I really wasn't sure it was anything I'd be interested in. But I told myself that all the women I think are amazing love this book - it's got to be good. Our small group for moms is reading it together and last night we had our discussion group.

The amazing women who love this book know what they're talking about. I was challenged to make a little bit of beauty in our every day lives. For me that is most challenging in the area of our daily meals, making it a time to come together and fellowship rather that just a pit stop.

So I tried to make something beautiful today. The first thing I thought of was an old table cloth that didn't fit my big table. When my grandmother passed away, I was given some of her household things - tablecloths, doilies, pretty dishtowels, etc. This particular tablecloth had a note firmly taped to it.

"Wedding gift to Paul and Helen from Helen's godmother"

It was written in my grandmother's beautiful cursive handwriting and obviously there because she wanted who ever was going to inherit this small white tablecloth to know it was more that just a piece of fabric. It was something special to her and that means it will be special to me.

It's littered with a few stains and will surely get more but it's our bit of beauty today. The girls saw me, prettying the table and trying my best to make today - broken van, teething baby, Josh working very late, dishes piled in the drain - plain old today special. One of them took out the broom and swept up the spilled playdoh I hadn't gotten to yet. Another put the baby to sleep with her sweet little voice and a pink pacifier. And another daughter danced around with happiness that the table was pretty.

It didn't take very long to pull this old piece of cloth out of the closet and spread it on the table. I won't be making anything fancy or special for dinner tonight, with Josh working late and our car troubles occupying my afternoon so far. But it will be special to my girls. Maybe it will take the sting out of having sandwiches for dinner. ;)

Addison

2011-02-06T21:01:00.002-05:00

My baby Addie is 4 months old. She's chubby cheeked and round bellied and sweet. She loves to talk and chatter with her sisters. She really loves holding onto her Daddy's bearded chin while having long conversations filled with smiles and coos. She's asleep on my lap right now, holding my finger. She looks like a little doll, all pink and perfect.

She looks nothing like the unresponsive, blue faced newborn that was whisked off my chest moments after birth.

That image is forever burned in my brain as a reminder of how fleeting life is. Thankfully, that was just a moment. Two hours after that horrific moment, a more fitting memory was made. I was handed my perfect, pink baby wrapped in a soft blanket. There have been innumerable moments since then that make me pause, collect my emotions, take a deep breath and thank my God for this treasure.

Alyssa

2011-02-03T08:23:00.003-05:00

We've returned from Alyssa's yearly check-up with the allergist. I feel like a deflated balloon. Again. This probably shouldn't be a letdown to me each year but it was once again.

She hasn't outgrown any of her allergies.
Her doctors don't really think she ever will outgrow them.
Numbers and test results were so high, they recommend putting off testing for two years to save Alyssa the pain and grief of the needles, blood work, etc.

I know food allergies are not a horrible, life threatening disease. Alyssa is a healthy girl who isn't deprived of anything. She has ice cream and cookies, macaroni and cheese, "peanut" butter and jelly...every food that kids are supposed to have available to them. She is getting better about speaking up and telling people she has food allergies.

The problem is me.
I have to relax and trust my daughter as well as the adults around her.

It's very anxiety-provoking to leave Alyssa at a friends' house or at the lunch period during her homeschool enrichment program. The whatifs are so numerous, I get butterflies just thinking about them. Are the teachers watching? Does she have her paper towel set out for her food? Are her friends crowding her area with their food? Does Mrs. ____ know she can't have ____? Is someone teasing her again?

I hate it.
But this is life for her and for us.
She doesn't hate it. And if I'm not careful, I'm going to make her hate it as well. God made Alyssa this way for a reason. Now to let her live her life so we can all see what those plans are for our sweetest girl!

Psalm 37:4

2011-01-27T08:02:00.002-05:00

Delight yourself also in the LORD,
And He shall give you the desires of your heart.

I've heard people say that this verse means if you follow the Lord, He will give you what you want.

...reading my bible, reading my bible, smile at old ladies, be nice to my boss, don't say bad stuff, say "fine" when people ask how you're doing, good Christian, good Christian, good Christian...discover long lost millionaire aunt who leaves you all her money and your problems are solved forever.

I don't really think that's how it works.

For me, learning to delight myself in the Lord has meant learning contentment. Is my situation perfect? Have I learned to handle every day stresses with a quaint smile and a kind word? Nope, not all the time. But I keep pushing ahead and I keep asking for grace. God doesn't ask us to be perfect, he asks us to be committed. Being delighted in the Lord means being happy about that commitment and learning to do things His way.

And then the desires of our hearts slowly change. Okay maybe the long-lost aunt thing would be nice but what you really want, deep in your heart, is to see your kids following the Lord and flourishing. You still think about that dream mansion but what makes you sigh with contentment is seeing your regular old, normal sized house overflowing with hospitality and the people you love. Those things become the desires of your heart. Things that the Lord wants for your life become the things you want for your life.

As your heart changes, those old desires might still be there but they aren't important any longer. That's usually when God decides to drop one of them into your lap just because He can. It may not be the exact size and shape you always dreamed of but it doesn't take long to realize this is God's version of your pipe dreams. And His version is always way better than ours.

2011-01-03T12:36:00.002-05:00

231. Making it through the first morning of school after Christmas break smoothly

232. Addie is napping in her pack'n'play. This is huge as she usually will only nap on me.

233. A New Year to learn contentment, control and patience.

234. Christmas gifts - the ones I gave and the ones I received.

235. my iPhone - the horribly addicting little gadget keeps my brain together.

236. January -for me - means that we're half way through winter. Although I know my corner of the world is known to get March snow storms, it's still the beginning of spring in my mind.

237. Sunshine

238. Dimples

Christmas Gifts

2010-12-24T10:07:00.001-05:00

-- Our Addie-boobah (as Lauren calls her!). I'm so thankful every time I look at her for the fast acting doctors and nurses as well as for God's grace. As Josh put it on Thanksgiving - I'm so thankful Addie learned how to breathe. Our year could have ended a LOT differently.

- The sale of our house. I'm not going to lie, it's hard to be thankful for this one sometimes. I'm definitely looking forward to building our dream house and being - finally being! - out in the country, it's been a long six months since the house sold.
It was hard for me to get into the Christmas spirit and hard to decorate a rental house I don't particularly like. But God's grace is sufficient- even for cranky housewives. My girls have had a great month. We are going to have a wonderful Christmas weekend. And best of all, God has amazing plans for our future.

-- Josh's job. He has a great boss and works with a great bunch of guys.

-- My friends who listen to me when I need to blahblahblah, who help me with my girls and who encourage me.

And probably a lot more things if I kept going but my hubby and daughters just returned from Christmas shopping. Merry Christmas!

Christmas update

2010-12-13T08:06:00.004-05:00

Addie:
* drooling, biting her hands, smiling constantly
* has a preference for one sister over the others
* just plain adorable

Lauren:
* enthralled with all things Christmas this year.
* happily obsessed with her baby sister
* knows how to play computer games. I'm not really sure when this happened.
* in general, the happiest and most sanguine kid in our house.

Alyssa:
* loving the roll of Addie's favorite "babysitter" while I'm doing dishes and such
* looking happily towards Christmas break
* excited that she gets to wear sparkly tights to Lael's guitar recital
* learning her multiplication tables

Lael:
* practicing for her first guitar recital
* reading books as fast as she can get her hands on them
* counting down the days to Christmas break
* loving that she's my kitchen back-up. Yesterday she got to make scrambled eggs and finish baking cookies.

Josh:
* busy as all get-out
* enjoying watching Christmas movies with his snuggle bug, Lauren
* happy that I'm almost done shopping. Haha :)

Me:
* finally feeling like it's Christmas time
* looking forward to Christmas break, probably more than the girls
* so thankful for Addie's wonderful sleep habits
* looking forward to giddy faces on Christmas morning when they see their gifts!

Merry Christmas!

2010-12-08T07:55:00.002-05:00

Black Friday

2010-11-22T08:20:00.003-05:00

Even if you aren't one of those crazy people who get up in the middle of the night to wait in line for the "it" item you need to have, there are some great deals to be found on Black Friday. This year, I'm shopping early on Black Friday - probably around 6am - but I'm going for everything but a TV or electronics.

Some things I shop for on Black Friday:

- kids' clothes - My girls seem to grow faster each year. If I can get pants and pajamas for half price, I'm stocking up. This year Sears has kids' jeans on sale for $5 as well as girls tops and sweaters 50% off. Good thing I have girls who like clothes because they'll be getting some under the tree!

- batteries - Cameras, handheld gaming systems, toys, flashlights, remote controls ... you name it, it needs batteries. Walgreens has their store-brand batteries on sale - buy one package for $3.99, get three free. Even if it is a store brand, you can't really beat that.

- art stuff - My girls love to draw. Last year I bought them each a huge art kit - over 100 pieces - for $8 on Black Friday. There are still some of the pieces hanging around. It was a great buy and I plan on doing it again. This year, Walmart has two different Crayola art sets on sale for $8 again.

- Playdoh - Another timeless item that my girls will play with for hours. And another one I got last year that I'm doing again. Walmart has a 24-pack of large Playdoh jars on sale for $8. This will be one of Lauren's gifts but I know they'll all get plenty of play time with that many jars to share.

- Small appliances - No one lines up to buy a slow cooker on Black Friday but it will be the one "big" item I'm going for. Sears has a brand name 2 quart slow cooker on sale for $9.99. My slow cooker, which I've had for 10 years, is now broken and I use it enough that it needs to be replaced. I've happily waited a couple of weeks, knowing that if I did I would be saving at least $10-20.

So that's some of my Black Friday list! What's on yours?

even the messes

2010-11-19T07:20:00.002-05:00

230. I'm thankful that when the most insane, humongous blowout I've ever dealt with - through all four kids - happened that it was at 1AM. No cries of oh gross! or that's disgusting! or little hands trying to help while only succeeding in spreading the mess. It was quiet. Addie was adorably happy to be getting cleaned up. And she wasn't wearing my favorite pajamas.

:-)

rolling along

2010-11-16T15:11:00.005-05:00

221. Bickering girls. If they didn't bicker and learn to resolve their conflict here, how would they ever learn that skill?

222. good music

223. clearance racks

224. my new-to-me Ergo that was passed on from a friend who didn't use it

225. big blue 3-year-old eyes looking at me saying "I'm a genius!"

226. Dunkin' Donuts coffee on the way to Lael's guitar lesson

227. Lyrics that clearly say the words I fumble on ... perfection has it's price but i could not afford to live that life. it always ends the same - a fight i'll never win

228. Not having to be perfect, not having to measure up, not having to fit in.

229. Just having to believe that God's grace is enough and Jesus paid the price for me a long time ago

2010-11-11T14:34:00.004-05:00

213. crossing items off the to-do list

214. when Josh stops home unexpectedly

215. Pine-Sol

216. washing machines

217. dryers

218. a dog who will happily stay outside all day

219. babies who put themselves on awesome sleep and nap schedules

220. the fact that Addison is one of those babies!

Gifts

2010-11-09T08:04:00.004-05:00

201. Seeing Lael carry 10 books around the library. Those are the ones she needs, she tells me.

202. Listening to Alyssa read a book to Lauren

203. Watching Lauren "read" a book to Addie

204. Warmth on a cold morning

205. Flannel sheets

206. $60 flannel sheets on sale for $20 :)

207. Knowing that even if I don't know the plans, God does.

208. Pumpkin spice creamer

209. BumGenius

210. Weekend plans that involve my family

211. A full bucket of homemade laundry soap

212. Memories

We are family.

2010-11-02T22:14:00.002-04:00

Josh
My husband works a lot. He loves his job and for that we are thankful! But it's still hard for him and us to have him gone so much of each week. Such is life though. I'm proud to say that Josh has been voted in as a deacon at our church recently. It adds a bit more to his already full plate but when God seems to be walking you down a road, you follow. We are also still trying to get our land cleared so that we can start leveling and digging first thing in the spring to build our house. It's been a huge leap of faith for us to sell our house and continue to trust that things will fall into place for building. It's a good lesson for us all.

Lael
Our oldest daughter continues to be a huge help around the house. Each morning, she is up with Alyssa and Lauren about an hour before I am up with Addison. By the time I'm upstairs with Addie and have enjoyed a cup of coffee, Lael has made breakfast for herself and her sisters. She also makes lunch most days and will happily pitch in with dinner if I need her help. Lael has been our biggest example of the reality that each and every child is different. She is a unique bundle of energy! But we trust God that if we continue to be faithful, that she will be an asset to the Kingdom of God as she grows.

Alyssa
Our sweet Alyssa turned 7 this past weekend! It's hard to believe that it's been nearly 7 years that we've been dealing with food allergy issues in our blonde girl. It just seems like second nature at this point. Even Lauren will ask for someone to read her the ingredients on something before she gives it to Alyssa. This has been another area of faith for us. We're thankful beyond words that Alyssa's health issues aren't more serious but we trust God that she will outgrow them in His time. It's been a big season of growth for Alyssa. She's had to step up and be Lauren's "chore buddy" around the house. She also conquered her fear of putting her head under water at her swim classes. Alyssa continues to demonstrate such a sweet and considerate personality. We're blessed by her every day.

Lauren
Our little charmer is still working her magic on us, even though she's no longer the youngest. This little blue eyed girl can charm the socks off just about anyone! Lauren is such a funny and sweet girl. She has her moments of three-year-old-ness, but for the most part she's an absolute joy. Lauren adores her baby sister like no child I've ever seen. She likes to look at her, hold her, sing to her, read her books, sit next to her... you get the idea. Lauren tried to play Barbies with Addie today. It didn't work so well obviously but her adoration for her sister is so fun to watch. We're (okay I'm) getting better at looking past Lauren's cuteness and we're working on some of her flaws - a major one is she talks with her thumb in her mouth. She's getting really good at remembering to take out her "thumby" and speak clearly. When she does, she sounds like a 16 year old! The things she comes out with are hilarious!

Addison
It's hard to believe it's been a month since our baby Addie was born. She's growing like crazy and starting to smile. I'm happy to report that she's grown enough that she comfortably fits into our BumGenius OneSize cloth diapers. We've only used them for one full day but I'm beyond happy with this product so far. Addie continues to be a champion sleeper and a sweet, easy going baby during the day. When she's hungry or needs to be changed, she will definitely let her issue be known but for the most part, she's amazing!

Me
Well, I'm busy! Transitioning to four daughters has been a bit rough. Keeping homeschooling rolling along with 4H, swim classes, Lael's guitar lessons and my small group at church has been challenging at times. None of the girls in this family (myself included!) do well with being at home all day for days on end. We need to get out so the activity has been good for us. I find myself at times feeling like I've got this thing down pat but then swinging violently to a crumbling mess with a dirty house and hot dogs for dinner. Again. But I'm adjusting and learning how to keep all the plates spinning. I want to grow and be more like Christ each day. Thankfully God's mercies are still new each morning and every time I come to Him, His grace is enough for me.

Sisters

2010-10-27T12:59:00.004-04:00

Here is a photo of our Addison Jane at around a week old:

And here is big sister Lauren at about a week old:

Sisters!

Since October 1...

2010-10-11T15:26:00.001-04:00

I have not cooked a meal. Our
church does an amazing job with spoiling new moms. Members of the church bring dinners for a week. Lunches have been leftovers or sandwiches - mainly prepared by Lael along with breakfast. I haven't done a thing!

I have not used cloth diapers for more than an afternoon. Although Addison is a large baby, she has skinny legs and fitting her into prefolds has been a challenge. She doesn't like diaper changes, which adds to the challenge as well. And to be perfectly honest, I can't imagine adding to my laundry right now. My wonderful husband has encouraged me to just relax and use disposables, even though my wild hormones had me on quite a guilt trip at first. How could I not use these great diapers I got such a deal on?! Didn't he understand how much money I was saving us? Thankfully, he appreciates my sanity more than he appreciates extra money. We will switch to cloth when Addie fits into them properly. But I won't feel condemned for using disposables until then.

I have worn pre-pregnancy pants and could breathe deeply the whole time. :-D

I have used paper plates way too much.

I have snuggled my smooshy girl nonstop.

I have slept wonderfully, thanks to not-so-little Miss Addie. She usually gets one good 4 hour stretch of sleep each night. This is heavenly for me, since I was waking hourly during the last two months of my pregnancy.

My daughters did their first full day of school today. By the time they were done, the house was trashed since Lauren's favorite thing
to do during school is cut and glue things. Paper shreds wind up everywhere! But we did it and that's what matters.

Josh and I have stared at Addie endlessly. What a gift she is and how close could we have been to losing her. I know it was just two hours before Addie was stabilized and perfectly fine but what an eye-opener those two hours were! The name Addison basically means "son of Adam.". Jane means "God is gracious." The combination of the two is perfect -- we are all sinners, sons of Adam but God is gracious. We have been given a path to grace where there was none. Addie's birth will always remind me of that.

Addison Jane

2010-10-07T09:14:00.002-04:00

Addison Jane arrived on October 1 at 7:30pm. She was 10 pounds 0.4 ounces and 21 inches long at birth! Her arrival was a bit traumatic but we've all recovered at this point.

Here is her story, but it's full of birth details that some people may not want to read...

For the two weeks leading up to my due date, I was having contractions pretty regularly. Addie had also moved down, which was great, but it was also causing her to put pressure on nerves in my hip joints. I was increasingly uncomfortable every day. My doctor, while giving me more space than I ever expected she would, was getting nervous about the size of the baby. I was due on Friday September 24. On Tuesday Sept. 28, I had a check-up and my doctor asked to schedule an induction. At that point I was 3cm and 80% effaced. Although Addie looked great on the non-stress test and I wasn't showing any warning signs of issues, I was just huge. Women get big bellies when they're pregnant, I know. But I was really big. Dr. B was concerned about the baby getting stuck during birth. So induction was scheduled for Thursday morning at 7am.

That night, I had contractions for hours. My mom came up to stay with us a night early, just in case I was going into labor on my own. Around 11 that night, I decided to lay down and rest. My contractions stopped. Throughout the day Wednesday, I contracted on and off. I was just hoping it was helping me dilate a bit more.

Early Thursday morning, we went to the hospital for the induction. And we waited. Finally my doctor came out and told us the hospital was full of laboring women and short on nurses. We were sent home and told they'd call to let us know when to come back. It was disappointing and deflating. I was ready to meet my baby. So we went home and rested. When we heard back from them, we were told to come back the next morning. Two of the four laboring women in the hospital had wound up with c-sections and the nursing staff was still short.

At 3:11am Friday morning, I woke up feeling funny. I rolled over and tried to sleep. Finally at 3:40am, I got up to use the bathroom and my water broke. I was so excited because I was sure this meant my labor would go faster. If my body was pushing forward, it must be ready to deliver the baby! We headed into the hospital and got hooked up to the monitors. My contractions were averaging 5-7 minutes apart but not super painful yet. My doctor checked me around 7 am and I was "maybe a 4." That was a bit deflating as I'd assumed that with all the contracting I had been doing since she checked me Tuesday afternoon, my dilation would have been further along. We walked (we being me, Josh and our wonderful friend Sandy), we timed, I rolled on the birth ball, we tried to keep each other distracted. The doctor checked me again around Noon.

I was at 5cm. 5 hours of contractions and I'd only dilated 1 more cm. My doctor told me she would check me again in a couple of hours. If I hadn't made any more progress, we would have to start discussing pitocin. My water had broken nearly 12 hours earlier and she didn't want to risk infection. At around 2:30, she checked me again. I hadn't dilated any further. It was time to start pitocin. Now the decision had to be made on an epidural. I had done pitocin without an epidural before and knew my body didn't respond well to it. As much as I try to relax through contractions, my body reacted to the pain by tensing. Tense body = no dilation. After many tears and much discussion, I decided to get an epidural. After weeks of contractions and hours of active labor, I was tired. So very tired. And I didn't feel condemned or like a failure. I felt like I was doing what needed to be done so I could birth this baby.

The epidural was in (and relatively painless compared to the contractions) and turned on at 4:15pm. The pitocin was started at 4:30. I was so comfortable and sure of my decision, I was nearly giddy. The doctor checked me at 6pm and I was a stretchy 8cm. The doctor said she could stretch me to a 10 easily. I cried with relief. By 7pm, I felt pressure and everyone scurried to prep for me to deliver. Around this time I started vomiting as well. I started pushing at 7:15. Addie was born at 7:30pm on the dot.

That's when everything started.

Doctor put Addie right up onto my belly and I noticed right away that there were globs of yellowish mucus on her face. And she was gray. All the nurses were rubbing her with blankets and talking to her and suctioning her nose and mouth. But she was gray. After maybe 30 seconds, the doctor whipped Addie off my belly and took her to the other side of the room to start working on her. A nurse leapt over my bed to go with the baby.

I heard things like
"no respiration"
" heart rate steady"
"low O2"
"page ER doctor STAT"

And I just could lay there and pray. Josh held my hand, standing next to me praying the whole time. I kept asking if she was alright. I asked Sandy to go pray over Addie, as close as they would let her get. She went and prayed. I heard the loudspeaker through the hospital calling the ER doctor to OB. For me. For my baby. It was around that time that Sandy turned and looked back at me. I was hemmoraging. I won't go into detail about the amount of blood but it was bad. Sandy has been to countless births and she knew that there was something wrong. By the time the ER doctor got up to us, it had been 6 minutes. I had been laying there hemmoraging for 6 minutes. Thankfully, the ER doctor that night was an OB doctor as well. She started to work on me. I was shaking and vomiting pretty uncontrollably at this point. My doctor came over and told me that Addie had a chunk of mucus in her lungs. They cleared it but her respirations were not yet regular and her O2 levels were low. They were taking her to the nursery to put her in an oxygen tent and run tests to check for more clogs. Josh went with Addie.

Once I was fixed up, I was still dizzy and nausous. I couldn't really move without vomiting. I was around 8pm at this point. I posted on my Facebook for prayer. Addie was still in the oxygen tent. I heard x-ray being paged STAT to OB. Mostly I just laid there and prayed. Every time a nurse came in, I asked for more details. Her respirations were getting more regular. Her oxygen level was improving. Her chest x-ray was clear. It was looking alright now. I was going crazy since any movement still caused me to vomit. By around 9, the nurses had brought me a wheelchair so I could go to the nurery and be with Addie. I still was feeling queasy so I ate some lemon ice, hoping the sugar would help me. It did help. My epidural was taken out. I waited. Some where in here, they took my temp and it was 101.9. More meds. Infection talk. Ugh.

By 9:30, they had finally wheeled Addison back to me. She was pink and beautiful. She still wasn't crying a lot but she was breathing. After a quick visit from one of our pastors and a good friend (their husbands - how on earth did they get there so fast?!), Addie nursed and fell asleep. My fever slowly came down and by Saturday morning it was 99.8. We stayed in the hospital until Sunday late morning to be sure Addie could hold a steady body temp and I took several rounds of antibiotics through my IV.

It was the longest two hours of my life. We realize now how much we take for granted. I never even considered that there could be complications with birth after such a normal pregnancy.

We're all home and comfy now. Thank God.

Overdue

2010-09-30T09:40:00.001-04:00

We are still awaiting the arrival of our little Addison Jane. I'm about a week overdue. This is the longest I've been pregnant and no one - including me really - thought I'd go this long. I'm quite huge and Addison is pushing for the "biggest Card baby" record.

Right now we are waiting for a call from my doctor, letting me know when to go into the hospital for an induction. My doctor is not interested in my pregnancy lasting much longer, due to Addie's size.

Hopefully the next post is a picture of a sweet newborn.

trust

2010-09-09T08:37:00.004-04:00

I'm not perfect.
I wake up in the morning sometimes and want to hide under the covers, rather than get moving and manage my children.
I lose my temper.
I get frustrated.
I thank God every day that He has enough grace for every time I mess up 'cause it's a lot. If He told Peter to forgive his brother seventy-seven times, how much more must God himself for give us?

Two of my daughters walk around singing songs about why it's fun to obey Mommy and Daddy.
One does not. She pushes me to my outermost limits of sanity sometimes. regularly.
I cling to God's promise that with His grace and my feeble attempts, my girls will be amazing servants of God. Even the sanity-pushing one. She's a tough nut to crack and I trust that God has a plan for her (and that toughness!).

I've heard the whispers and seen the looks of disgust when my children didn't behave as all the other children were behaving. Or even worse, if they are disobeying and I don't respond in the perfect, I-love-every-minute-of-this voice. As we've already gone over I mess up a lot.
Some would say it's all in my mind.
I've had invites ignored, greetings unreturned and most painfully seen my children left out.
It hurts.

But I trust that God knows the truth about us.
I'm trying and my daughters are changing and growing closer to Him.
He gave me these children for a reason.
I'm the right mom for them (she says so!)- as hard as that is to believe at times. We will make it. My daughters will learn to follow Him because all this 'obey Mommy' stuff is really just practice for the big time. They have to learn to obey God, not just me.

So today, trust God. We'll make it, moms. Who cares what the perfect mom up the street is doing? You aren't her and she doesn't have to raise your kids. God gave you your kids for a reason. Cling to His promises even when it seems hopeless.

And have your own party when you don't get invited to the perfect mom party. ;-)

blips

2010-09-03T07:25:00.002-04:00

-- It's been hot. Really hot. Near 90 degrees and humid each day, with temps barely getting down into the 60's at night. Not the most comfortable weather for someone who is as large as I am. Today is the day it's supposed to break though and I'm about ready to throw a party to celebrate.

-- I'm 37 weeks - officially full term for those of you who don't speak 'pregnant' - and we're ready for Addie any time she decides to arrive. Diapers washed, bassinet clean, clothes folded. I have to pack a hospital bag, but I really don't think I'll be going into labor for a couple weeks yet. My doctor still has concerns that Addie is going to be very large. I think I broke through a bit when I reminded her that I delivered a 10 pound posterior baby naturally. She looked at me a bit shocked and said "You delivered a 10 pounder posterior? Well then you could probably deliver a 12 pound baby!" Yes, Dr. B. Welcome to the party. That is exactly what I've been trying to tell you for weeks.

-- We enjoyed a one-day visit from my mom and my twin 8-year old nephews this past week. The boys have enough energy to keep up with Lael, so to say that everyone had a fun day would be a gross understatement. They're so close in age that they just click together and off they go! Everyone was wonderfully behaved -- even when we took all five of them into the grocery store. I like well behaved kids. :)

-- Have I mentioned that this house is tucked far enough off the main road that we hear almost no traffic noise? It's so quiet, compared to living on a main road for two months and right off the main road for 8 years. I'm enjoying it very much.

-- I like hearing the geese flying overhead. Even if it is crazy hot, the geese know it's September. Cooler weather is coming!

I made it!

2010-08-27T12:31:00.003-04:00

When I wake up each morning, snuggled under a blanket and feeling a bit chilled I know that I made it.

I survived summer huge and pregnant.

Granted we might have a few more hot days but I know the end is in sight. The tops of the trees are starting to turn pretty colors. My family happily devoured a pot of chicken stew. I find myself closing windows in the evenings. It's lovely.

Some other things I'm enjoying:

- The last few weeks of my pregnancy. Today I'm entering my 36th week. The last month of this pregnancy snuck up on me big time. I'm enjoying slowly sorting through baby clothes and looking at all the tiny, sweet little outfits our Addie will wear soon. This little darling is still quite active! I love that her kicks and wiggles are still a part of my day.

- Wii Sports Resort. I have to admit that the Wii didn't get a lot of play time during the summer. Now that it's cooling off, I find that the girls are playing it more again. Sports Resort is hands down our favorite game.

- Our curriculum choices for this year are working out well. I'm finding that the extra time I'm spending with Alyssa is really paying off already. Her reading is improving by leaps and bounds. Lael has had to adjust her expectations a bit, as sitting at her computer isn't nearly as exciting as she'd hoped! But things are getting a little more smooth each day and for that I'm thankful.

- The chore chart I threw together two weeks ago are still working well also. It's similar to this but not nearly as pretty! Our little system helps me to keep straight what everyone has done (or not done ...) by dinner time.

Things I'm hoping to accomplish before Addie arrives:

- Finding our bins of clothes. They are all in our storage room somewhere and I'd like to get the clothes, jackets, winter coats, hats & accessories as well as our changing table. Once it's here, I can take time to go through them, organize diapers on the changing table, figuring out what coat fits which kid ... all that fun stuff.

- Stocking our freezer. Our favorite meat store will be delivering a few hundred pounds of beef right around the time I'm due. My mom will take home half and we will have plenty left to go with the chicken I purchased last week. Then in October, I'd like to stock up on our favorite breakfast meats as well. 8 O'Clock Ranch ships nationwide so check them out if you've ever wondered how grass-fed meat tastes. It's delicious! Wondering why I'd even spend so much money on meat?? Check this out and you will understand.

- Hospitality. Starting tonight! And I'm still in my ~~pajamas~~ lounge clothes, with not much more than school accomplished for the day. Good thing our guests tonight aren't the picky type!

our homeschool, year 5

2010-08-08T19:33:00.004-04:00

Year 5?! Seriously, have I been doing this for FIVE years??!!

Yep I have. Lael is going into the 4th grade and Alyssa is going into 2nd grade. Lauren will be doing a bit more of a preschool lesson time this year. Since we're expecting Addie in late September, we've just sold our house and moved twice in 8 weeks and are now starting to work on details for building our dream house - okay seriously just typing all that made me tired - we're doing things a bit differently this year.

Both girls will be doing these free typing lessons as well as regular visits to the library for free reading books. Here is a brief overview of what each girl will be learning:

Lael
If you've never interacted with Lael, the first thing you need to know about her is that she's incredibly driven. She likes to do things her way and on her time (which is usually now!). Lael is also very diligent when her responsibilities are laid out in front of her. She is an excellent reader and a very smart girl. All these things combined with our life situation right now lead us to a curriculum that is very independent. We settled on Monarch. I don't have to worry about computers crashing and losing her schoolwork. She can customize it a bit and will have to answer to her dashboard for her daily assignments. The crazy girl is begging me to start school tomorrow. This will be balanced with written book reports on a regular basis as well as journaling and free reading.

Alyssa
For every bit of Lael that is driven and diligent, Alyssa is tenderhearted and kind. Making sure that Lauren has her favorite sippy cup and her Bitty Baby is much more important that reading or math to our sweet girl. Because that kindness (coupled with my laziness) lead to a lot of distraction last year, we knew it was a good year for me to spend some extra time with Alyssa on her school work. She learns well with repetition so we've switched curriculum with her also. After our success and enjoyment of Abeka phonics grade 1, we decided that it would be smart to continue the same program - both for budget (since I'd purchased every flash card, reader and review chart imaginable!) but also for continuity in Alyssa's learning. I happened upon an amazing deal here for grade 2 teacher's manuals in every single subject, we decided to just take the plunge and use Abeka for everything but math. Again, in the interest of continuity, we'll be using Singapore Math for 2nd grade. Regular journaling will work their way into book reports both for language practice but also handwriting review.

Lauren
Our little Lauren is growing up so quickly! It's hard to believe she'll be a big sister soon. She will be following in her big sisters' footsteps and starting preschool with workbooks from the dollar store. Intense, huh? ;-) I found a whole set of Sesame Street books last year and Lauren's looking forward to sitting at the table with Alyssa to do school.

Organization
Since we don't have all our bookshelves and an extra room dedicated to storing them in this house, things will be stored a little different this year. I've slowly been color coding the girls over the last few weeks. Water bottles, laundry hampers, coat hooks, toothbrushes, towels ... you name it. For Alyssa and Lauren they will each have a bin similar to this in their color, stored in the storage closet. In their bin will be all their school books as well as a pencil box with their crayons, pencils, glue and such. {The one great thing about the big W's "college" section is that everything is color coded! I love it! The bins we'll be getting are $3 each and in just the right colors.}

I will also be using the same planner I fell in love with last year. It's especially fantastic this year because a friend wound up with two copies rather than the one she paid for and gave the extra copy to me. The publisher had made a small error that I fixed in about 5 minutes, making me extremely happy and blessed! It is an excellent tool for not only homeschool planning, but general household planning, menus, shopping lists and extracurricular activities. I would highly recommend it for any homeschooling mom who is trying to keep her head on straight.

So that's everything! What are your homeschool plans for this year?

moved.

2010-08-07T19:42:00.002-04:00

We are all moved into our rental house with no boxes, misplaced baskets or bags in sight. Photos are displayed, pretty vases are on shelves, all our Adirondack decor is placed through the house. Everyone is happy here - very happy. It's quiet and the girls have been completely enjoying playing outside. Even the dog loves it!

Josh and I are pretty exhausted this weekend. It seems that the entire month of July was spent doing all the things the girls asked to do this summer -- a weekend in the Adirondacks at Nana and Papa's house, a weekend on Long Island complete with a trip to the city (well that one had been planned since March!), lots of days at the beach and our friends' pool, shopping and fun. It's selfish to say but I'm ready for August to be for us. Relaxing Saturdays, slow evenings and quiet Sundays ... starting with today! We puttered around today, just doing what ever struck our fancy. It was very nice. Tomorrow Josh is going fishing with some friends for the afternoon. It's just what he needs right now - an afternoon relaxing, doing what he loves.

We're gearing up for Addie's arrival which is now anywhere from 6-8 weeks away. Just a few little things left to get and plenty of things to wash, then we're ready. I'm getting anxious to meet this active little one. Well, she's probably not so little but that's what we've come to expect. My guess right now is between 9lb. 7 oz and 9 lb. 10 oz. Soon enough we will see!

knives

2010-08-02T22:18:00.001-04:00

I cried today.
We were at our storage room and I wanted my butcher block of knives. They were no where to be found.
So I pulled out my rocking chair, right into the middle of the chaos, sat down and cried.

This is the scene that my poor husband walked into.
Then he found the knives.
And asked me repeatedly why I was crying over knives.

I said I just wanted my knives and my kitchen and our house to be settled. But it's not just that.

I'm exhausted.
My doctor is creating drama in my life.
Other situations are adding more drama. The kind of drama that makes me want to walk away and never look back. I don't like drama.
My daughters are tired of upheaval. They've been amazing but they're all ready for a house that feels like home.
My husband is going on a business trip. He's packing right now. It's just an overnighter but even that 48 hours - in the middle of all this - is just hard.
And I couldn't find my knives, one if them being a Christmas gift from last year.

But my hubby found my knives.
My doctor will be reminded that she works for me and I've done this whole 'deliver a large baby' thing before.
Drama will cease. Or I'll just keep ignoring it.
My daughters will quickly settle in to our adorable rental house. And we will make progress on our dream house.
My hubby will be back soon.
God is faithful. Everything will be fine.

And I have my knives.

mid-summer blips

2010-07-14T08:09:00.002-04:00

- We are about two weeks away from moving into a permanent rental that will be home until our dream house is built. I'm very, very excited to get into a house with a nice yard and not have to move again until we are good and ready. I never thought that I'd be one who would miss "stuff" but I miss my stuff. My leather chair, my dresser, my knickknack's. I can't wait to go through everything and get our home organized.

- Each and every day I'm shocked at what people say. Whether it's asking me if I'm finally going to get my tubes tied after baby girl #4 arrives or if it's telling me how foolish we are for wasting our money on a rental all winter -- really?! I didn't know any of that was open for discussion with strangers or acquaintances. My close friends don't even bother to ask because if they don't already know, they understand I don't want them to know. We're pretty transparent people. We've gone over with an infinite number of people why we're moving through the building process slowly. And our decisions on future babies are really no one else's business. Another thing most people who know me understand. But still, opinions are like ... well you know. Everyone's got 'em. ;-)

- I'm just about 30 weeks pregnant which means for me it's time to start thinking about what I need for this baby's arrival. Thankfully not much! We've got cloth diapers galore, clothes to get us started and a new-to-us car seat/stroller combo that is in great shape. My Moby wrap has just been found and I'm looking forward to using that again during the newborn stage. Our bassinet is waiting in storage to be stripped down and washed. I think the only think left is a bouncy seat, which are easily found. Eventually we'll need a new crib, thanks to Lauren and her acrobatics. What is now her toddler bed is in no shape to be turned back into a crib. She did quite a number on the railings.

- We've just returned from a long weekend away that we spent with my parents. A trip to our favorite little zoo, mini golfing in Lake George, fishing, swimming and sitting around a fire in the backyard -- it was just what we needed. The girls and I will be heading for a longer weekend of traveling on the train, time with family, swimming in the pool and a day in New York very soon. I'm also hosting a mini-reunion with my good friends from high school right before we leave for downstate. These girls were my closest friends during our high school days but I haven't seen most of them in 10+ years. Kinda crazy. It will be great to see everyone and meet their children.

- It's been a busy summer but we're enjoying it. The days are flying by and soon enough we will be meeting our little baby and settling in for a cozy winter. I'm not wishing away days but I'm definitely looking forward to a little order and scheduling that comes with school in the fall.

Update:

2010-06-24T08:05:00.003-04:00

It's been a long time and a lot has happened in the last few months. Here goes:

Family -- As you probably already know, we sold our house in order to move closer to our dream of building our own house and living in the country. We live in a not-so-great economic area but thankfully our house was in one of the few larger towns. Our house went on the market on March 4. We had 5 showings in two days and received 2 offers on the fifth day. Even though we accepted one of those offers, the buyers' lost their financing. (The other potential buyer decided to walk away.) On April 4, we received offer number 3. They were very serious buyers and the process moved through quickly and smoothly. We closed on June 4 - exactly three months from when we listed the house. It was amazing to us that things went so fast, considering the real estate market around us. We're now living in a temporary rental house that is huge, beautiful and unfortunately in the middle of lots of college students. There have been a few incidents I'd like to forget but we just keep reminding ourselves that this is temporary. We will be moving into a lovely little house on a quiet dead end street in about 5 weeks! The search for a rental to live in while we build has also been a bit stressful, but we've finally got a place and that has been a huge relief.

The girls - Let's see. Each of the girls handled moving in a different way. They each had a harder time than we thought but we've moved through it now and I'm SO happy for that. Lael turned 9 last week and enjoyed celebrating with family and friends. My parents shocked us all by buying her a netbook for her to use in the fall for homeschooling. It has turned out to be a great help, as my laptop had to go into the shop. We took her shopping for clothes - her favorite thing and Josh's paents spent an afternoon here to celebrate her as well. She also had some time at our little beach in town, with two friends and some cake! Can't beat that, right? Alyssa has had the hardest time with moving. We've had to help her work through some fear issues that seemed to have nothing to do with moving, but she's made huge progress. She has also enjoyed having a very large bedroom, that she only shares with Lauren. in our old house, all three girls were in one room. Lauren has had the smoothest transition thus far. She did ask a couple of times when we were going home right after the move, but has quickly shifted into loving this house and I'm sure she will love the next one too. The hardest part for all the girls has been the loss of their fenced in backyard. I cannot thank the Lord enough that the rental we'll live in until our perfect house is built has a great yard!

Josh -- We finished moving the big things out of our house on Memorial Day, May 31. The day after that, Josh went to the doctor. (Over the next two days, we also had to finish cleaning and moving things out of the garage.) He had been having stomach pains that we were associating with his umbilical hernia for much too long. After tests, the doctor referred him right to a surgeon - not only did he have the umbilical hernia but he had a blockage in his appendix that needed to be removed immediately. Just barely a week after moving - Josh went into the hospital to have his appendix removed and the hernia repaired. We are thankful for the timing of it all. If we had waited much longer, we were told it was likely his appendix would have burst. The surgeon said his appendix was quite inflamed and a time bomb waiting to go off. The hernia surgery recovery has taken longer than Josh would like but when you mess with muscles like that - it takes awhile to heal! He's back to work now but has been told to not do any heavy lifting or strenuous stomach exercises until August or September.

August. hm. Kind of a bummer considering we wanted to start clearing land for our driveway. If Josh can't pick up trees and brush, he can't clear land.

God knows, though. We are just taking it as a season of rest. So it looks like we won't start building or even really clearing land until late fall or early next spring. We also have to move again the first week in August, when Josh still won't be 100%. Opportunities for faith surround us!

Me -- Well, I'm pregnant. haha. If you've never met me or noticed me during a pregnancy - I get rather round. Right out front, nice and low - round like a basketball that is growing into a beach ball every day. It's hard to believe that the third trimester is quickly approaching. Little baby girl - whose first name will be Addison, but still has no definite middle name - is very active and wiggly. She has three sisters who already talk about her like she's sitting right next to them, which I think is the cutest thing ever! I'm trying my hand at sewing a baby quilt, under the supervision of a very talented friend. I'm just sewing together the top, then she's going to make it pretty. I hope it comes together. We've also decided that I'm taking a break from canning this year. It was a hard one for me to take, as I love filling the shelves with produce that was preserved at the height of freshness. But not having another thing to think about right now is nice.

So I think that's it. Kudos to you if you made it this far!

Old Age

2010-06-04T06:46:00.002-04:00

Reasons I am getting too old to live in the village:

- I look at the college students who seem to be wandering aimlessly from house to house at all hours and think "why aren't you working or in classes?!"

- When a car goes by blasting loud music or revving it's engine so the (purposefully) loud exhaust can be heard, I remind my girls how disrespectful it is to disturb other people like that.

- People who shout nonsense out their car windows earn a mean stare and head shake. Occasionally a tsk is thrown in.

- 10 pm is my bedtime. When people disturb my bedtime, I call the police.

For this and several other reasons, I pray and beg that our rental over the next year will be in the country. This old lady needs some peace and quiet. ;)

moving

2010-05-25T07:41:00.002-04:00

We're in the home stretch. All the official paper work is moving through lawyers' offices nicely and things seem to be progressing on schedule. That will probably mean a closing date some time next week.

My house is starting to echo.

The toy room/school room/den (we never really picked a name for it) that used to house packed bookshelves and comfy chairs is now just a home for two chairs. Most of the toys are packed. All the books are packed - and we have a lot of books!

Pictures are off the walls and extra shoes are packed away.

Vases and knick-knacks are piled on top of the china cabinet as they await their assigned boxes.

The back room - keeper of all things to be used out doors - is nearly empty.

The basement and garage - keepers of all extra furniture, tools and seasonal items - are nearly empty.

We're making good progress. I like progress. And I like that I'm not a super emotional or sentimental person. It makes all this packing just another item on my to-do list that needs to be checked off. I see all the things I will not miss. Would you like to hear them? Sure you would!

- The kitchen sink. Not only is it a permanent color of dingy white, impossible to clean, but it's also set very far back from the edge of the counter. I'm short to begin with but when you put a big pregnant belly on the front of a short person it becomes nearly impossible to stand comfortably at this sink. I wind up standing sideways and reaching over in an uncomfortable, wanna be yoga pose just to reach the faucet. Definitely won't miss the sink.

- The squeaky stairs. Josh has done his best to repair these but really. They are 105 year old stairs. You can only do so much. And they are so loud.

- The windows. Half of them are as old as the stairs and desperately need to be replaced. The don't open any longer. It makes these near 90 degree days we're having pretty unbearable.

- The tile in the front entry way. The grout is pretty much non-existent and some of the tiles are loose. We've planned to replace it for 8 years now and it's not happened. Now we don't have to!

- The loose spindles on the side porch.

- Traffic noise. I know this one may not get any better at our next location but in the long run it will. An 18wheeler blew a tire at 3AM last night. It's really loud, if you've never heard it. I won't miss that.

So this list could go on and on because there are lots of things I won't miss about this old gray house. And the longer the list gets, it makes it easier to not think about the door frame we've measured the girls' heights on for years - even if half of it did get scrubbed away by an energetic helper. Or the yard we've all poured ourselves into making just the way we love it, with the shaded patio that has been the center of so many parties and gatherings, the playground that's been the center of laughter and fun or the garden where we learned to grow our own produce. And the list definitely helps to push away the visions of nearly every birthday and Christmas we've celebrated as a family - Lael's first birthday party in the pouring rain, a little Alyssa riding her tricycle around the Christmas tree, a sweet baby Lauren who grew into a hilarious toddler, running around these rooms.

Nearly 8 years to the day that we moved into this house as a family of three, we'll move out a family of five-soon-to-be-six and ready for the next step. Thank God we can take memories and photos and videos with us. All we're really leaving behind are squeaky stairs and a dingy sink.

Outside

2010-05-18T06:53:00.003-04:00

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 3:5-6

The packing has begun. We have about three weeks until our sale of this house closes and we move on to what God has for us. That still isn't totally clear so stress is right there waiting to break me down at any moment. What I do know is that we have a beautiful, spacious house to call home for the summer months. That is enough for me right now because that is all God has shown us thus far. I'm confident we will find a place to live as we walk through this building process but waiting is hardly my strong suite.

Today, we're leaving. My girls and I are piling in a van with some great friends and taking a field trip. The Wild Center is our destination. Have you been there? If not, you should try it out if you like the outdoors. The whole museum is a big circle with hands-on exhibits and information for kids of all sizes. It also has amazing walking trails that smell just like summer should smell - pine trees, crunchy leaves, slow moving streams and fresh air. I love the mountains in the summer. Taking this trip is educational for my girls just as much as it's therapeutic for me. Something about the Adirondacks in summer just calms me. I need that right now.

trust

2010-05-12T06:31:00.003-04:00

I would have lost heart, unless I had believed

That I would see the goodness of the LORD
In the land of the living.
Psalm 27:13

Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?
So why do you worry about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; and yet I say to you that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.
Matthew 6:26-29

It's easy to lose heart, to give up, to worry. In this life, we have tangible needs. Food. Clothing. Shelter. Finances. When there is a healthy supply of those things, it's easy to trust the Lord. It's easy to thank and praise Him. And it's a good thing that we do thank and praise Him.

But what about when you don't have a place to live?
It's not so easy then.

We're selling our house. Yay! right? Well yes. It is a wonderful thing that we sold our house - and pretty quickly for our area. Our next step is to begin clearing land and building our dream house. It will be open and spacious and secluded and woodsy and bright and energy efficient. It is what we've dreamed of building for about 8 years now. We're going to take our time building and I have no dreams of being in the new house any time soon. That's fine with me. I don't want our family stressed out to the max just as we're welcoming a new baby into the family or through the holiday season. So next year some time, we'll move in to our new home.

So where do we go now? Where do we - 2 parents, 3 children + one on the way plus a nice (big) yellow dog - live while we're building our dream house?

We don't really know. That's a bit stressful.

We do have a temporary rental house available to us until the end of August. It's big, comfortable and furnished. A huge blessing. The landlords have existing contracts for the fall and winter though, so we will need another rental by mid-late August.

Little bit o' stress.
I'm due at the end of September.

But you know, this process has brought me to a place of just letting God do what He's going to do. It's not my job to know all the details or the whole plan. I've given that to Him. My job is to take each day, one at a time, caring for the issues of that day. Do I look through the paper and internet listings for houses? Yep! Do I ask friends if they know of rentals? Sure thing! I do what I can but I leave the final decision up to God. And I trust that He isn't going to leave us homeless. It's been an amazing lesson in believing the Lord will come through.

But if you hear of any rentals in our area, let me know okay?
;)

That mom.

2010-04-27T07:32:00.004-04:00

Last week, I was that mom. You know that mom, right? The one in disheveled clothes with unkempt hair, leading a pack of crusty-faced kids through Wal-mart in a big huff. Yep. I'm ashamed to say that I was that mom. Grocery shopping was the last thing I wanted to do and everyone was going to know it. We'd had a horrible day (which was launched from my poor attitude) and I was not fit to be out in public. But my family had to eat and therefore I had to shop. We were a sight, I'm sure.

Thank God for new mercies.

It's easy to take that road. The huffy, what's-in-it-for-me, chip on your shoulder path that so many people trudge down each day. I've taken that path many a times. It's free and clear of hindrances at the start of the path. It's just you and your whining, happily strolling together. Telling of every little bad thing any one has ever done to you, whispering of the hurts and bitterness you harbor deep inside. When you come upon a branch in your path, it's easy to just start complaining about that too! It's a nasty free fall and a path that can be quite ensnaring. All of the sudden, you are surrounded by your own webs and tangles of complaint and bitterness with no way out. But there is always a way out, if you want it.

Thankfulness is the key to breaking away the tangles and webs that ensnare our bitter hearts. Every thing looks dreary? Every thing looks hard? But did your children wake up this morning? Be thankful to God for that. Did the walls of your house keep the rain and snow off you while you slept? Be thankful for that. Are you flat broke, waiting for God to provide when it seems impossible? Be thankful that He will, even if it seems too late.

Life is much more enjoyable when you work at finding the good things - no matter how few there are - rather than pointing out every bad thing.

Psalm 100

Make a joyful noise to the Lord, all the earth!
Serve the Lord with gladness!
Come into his presence with singing!

Know that the Lord, he is God!
It is he who made us, and we are his;
we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.

Enter his gates with thanksgiving,
and his courts with praise!
Give thanks to him; bless his name!

For the Lord is good;
his steadfast love endures forever,
and his faithfulness to all generations.

Update:

2010-04-05T07:49:00.003-04:00

Lauren is:
- running faster, talking more and learning to stomp her foot in anger every day.
- still a cuddle bug. She fell asleep on Josh last night while watching Mary Poppins.
- developing an issue with bugs. She doesn't like anything to fly around her. This could obviously make for a very long summer.

Alyssa is:
- reading better every day.
- enjoying her first chocolate bar, found at the local health food store. It's dark chocolate with raspberries in it. Sounds good to me!
- losing her speech impediment slowly. I realized that it must be hard for her to reprogram how she speaks, but she's doing a great job.

Lael is:
- sad that basketball season is over.
- enjoying swim time at the local college. It's a class just for homeschoolers and some of her friends are in it with her.
- learning the balance of being a child and a big girl. That's a hard one too and she is doing a great job as well.

Josh is:
- happy the snow is gone.
- very busy with work. It's trade show season in our area, which means Josh works lots of weekends.
- looking forward to getting to the end of this "selling the house" roller coaster.

I am:
- riding the roller coaster as well. Our first accepted offer fell through because of financing difficulties the buyers experienced. We're on the verge of accepting another offer - hopefully. Then we ride through the flips and turns of inspection, appraisal, packing, finding a place to live and the buyers' final walk through.
- finally in my second trimester and feeling SO much better.
- taking it slow after a packed Easter weekend. My parents surprised us with a quick visit and we shoved everything we could into the 24 hours they were here. Easter Sunday was much quieter - just us, some backyard kickball and a bit of television.

Lauren!

2010-03-25T08:00:00.001-04:00

Happy 3rd Birthday Lauren!

what's going on here -

2010-03-22T12:36:00.004-04:00

- I haven't made anything yummy from scratch since my last post. This makes me feel like a total loser. But I do have good excuses as to why I haven't...

- We put our house on the market. Houses don't usually sell quickly around here. Apparently ours is. We've had unbelievable interest and have already accepted an offer. There are the usual snags so we aren't really sure what the next two months will hold. Lots of phone calls, emails, house showings and general chaos have been the norm around here. Hopefully the original buyers can get their ducks in a row and we'll have a closing date soon. Then we can work on little details like where we're going to live and will we have enough time to build our new house before the baby comes. Ya know... minor issues. ;-)

- Lael is now involved in two sports each week. Thankfully basketball ends next week and we'll be down to one. Swimming. But the past two weeks have been a little nutty with driving her (and her sisters, since they go everywhere we go!) around three days a week.

- Oh and we homeschool! That takes up a fair amount of time. Lael is learning long division and Alyssa is learning multiplication. Teaching these two concepts to my children in the same week takes up a good majority of my brain power. Math really isn't on my lists of strengths.

- And then there is the good ole pregnancy exhaustion. I've been feeling much, much better over the last two weeks or so but that still doesn't stop me from conking out on the couch for two hours every weekend. It's really not sleep. I think I go into a temporary coma because nothing wakes me up. It's very refreshing.

- My littlest girl will be 3 on Thursday. Unbelievable.

- Easter is really soon. I just got decorations out of their bin the other day. This one really caught me off guard. Hopefully the Easter bunny comes through because I have NO clue what's going n those cute little baskets.

So that's what is going on here. It's all very crazy and up-in-the-air right now but we're taking it day by day. April is looking just as wacky with Easter and then two weekends straight of visits from out-of-town relatives. If all is going well, I'll be packing somewhere in there too. Good thing I have more energy lately!

fresh!

2010-03-03T15:48:00.004-05:00

Back in our ~~dirt poor~~ financially lean years as a young married couple with a couple of kids running around, I made all our food from scratch. Bagels. Pretzels. Muffins. Granola. Granola bars. Snacks. Bread. Tortillas. Potato chips. Everything. This evolved over the years as finances changed and demands on my time changed. More store-bought foods found their way into my grocery cart each week. Some things stayed the same. Because of Alyssa's allergies, I still bake most of our sweet treats from scratch.

As I examined budget demands a couple years ago, I started making homemade laundry soap and household cleaners. Even though this does take a bit of time, the financial savings are such that I can't bring myself to buy detergent. Well no, I take that back. Once and awhile (usually around the holidays), I take a break and buy a bottle of detergent.

I find myself buying more pre-made groceries to save time. This is the way it is. There is a season for everything. As I find myself drawn out of the house more (usually by a daughter saying "Mooommmm, we're going to be late!") it is just more convenient for me to grab the tortillas for dinner at the store. But there is something so satisfying about sitting down to a meal with my family and knowing that I prepared -from scratch- every single thing those wonderful people are eating. Is it more challenging? Yep. Time consuming? You betcha. But totally worth it.

I made pretzels this afternoon for the first time in years. My girls don't even remember the last time I made them, which is the #1 thing that tells me it's been too long. When I told them I know how to make bagels, they looked at me like I'd grown another head! They don't remember that either. It's sad. We always have all the ingredients for most baked goods on hand (great reason for shopping in bulk!). I have no excuse but my own busy-ness or more likely my own laziness.

It's time for me to get back to the fresh stuff. Fresh bagels for breakfast. Fresh, sweet granola for snack time. Fresh bread for sandwiches at lunch. It's healthier, less expensive and creates awesome memories. That's what should matter.

Oh and fresh, crisp potato chips piled high next to a cheeseburger right off the grill. oh my. Probably not so healthy but we might have to work on that one next!

on and on

2010-02-18T08:50:00.005-05:00

191. Health, wellness and good appetites.

192. A great doctor

193. New couch cushions for free! We love Raymour and Flannigan.

194. Creative girls.

195. Family portraits

196. Lessons planned and ready

197. Plans with friends

198. A Mexican restaurant that delivers! To my house! This might be dangerous, people. Do you think they will include extra guacamole?!

199. Clean laundry

200!! Good habits.

Con't.

2010-02-15T07:10:00.004-05:00

183. Cloth diapers for a crazy great price

184. A great small group meeting

185. Weekends where all we do is what we want to do

186. A husband who makes me laugh

187. The Olympics. It's fun to cheer on our team and watch sporting events that I normally wouldn't.

188. My dog. He smells a bit but loves to lay at my feet - making the perfect footrest/foot warmer. Can't beat that.

189. The chatter of a happy 2 year old

190. Flurries but no big snow storms. We've been quite spoiled this winter.

In Sickness and In Health

2010-02-09T07:05:00.002-05:00

Its one of those lines in our marriage vows everyone says with stars and hearts in their eyes, right? I realized that we aren't just agreeing to love and care for our spouse through sickness and health but also our children.

We've been sick. On and off since New Year's, someone one has been sick with something. The stomach bug. A terrible head cold. The stomach bug again. And now our little Lauren is battling some sort of virus that keeps driving her fever up into a not-so-comfortable range. Her doctor is hopeful that it's just a virus that will pass through her system and we'll move on. That's what I'm hoping for as well. Otherwise, it's back to the hospital for more tests. Not so fun with a 2 year old.

This morning, Lauren seems good. She's a little warm but acting like herself (which means she was bossing her sisters around just a moment ago). It's a great improvement from yesterday's high 104.3 fever. We're praying that this is the beginning of the end. It's been a long few weeks.

Through it, I've been reading the first few chapters of this book. Our small group for mothers is going through it over the next few months. The first chapter is about loving motherhood and loving your children. They are two separate things. I love my children tons. Every mom does right? But do I love mothering them? Do I love serving them and showing them my love through my actions? Hmmm ... probably not all the time. It's been a real challenge for me through this season of ill-health to really think about loving not just my children, but loving to mother them.

I'm also learning to embrace the exhaustion and nausea of early pregnancy. God created woman for this purpose, after all. We are to bring forth children. It's not easy. But I choose to pray and speak blessing over my baby tucked in the perfect little home he or she has while God works His miracle.

Learning and growing. In sickness and in health. I'd choose health any day. But even when we walk through a season of sickness, God still reigns. He still listens. And He still gently leads us closer to Him.

He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young. Isaiah 40:11

Alyssa

2010-02-05T07:46:00.002-05:00

Well, we've survived it for another year. Alyssa's allergist appointment went as well as can be expected and we are all happy to be home.

We piled in the van with Nana and Papa to head to Clifton Park on Wednesday morning. I'm so thankful we've been able to stay at this location - Certified Allergy has several - as we were traveling into Troy for her visits. After gathering basic information and going over all the test results with the doctor, Alyssa is still highly allergic to all traces of cow's milk, eggs, peanuts and tree nuts. Unfortunately, the lab that did Alyssa's bloodwork uses a different scoring system for their RAST tests. The doctor wasn't too pleased about that. It doesn't give us as much of an understanding about what her allergies are doing. Either way though, Alyssa's numbers are in the 40-500 range. A specific allergen needs to test at less that 2 before the doctor will consider doing an in-office food challenge. Only with a number below 2 and a successful in-office food challenge is a child considered free of the allergy.

Now that Alyssa is 6, it's time to face up to the reality that she may not outgrow her allergies. Her doctor has been honest and forthcoming with us for 6 years now and we take her advice seriously. Once a child is over age 5 and still has incredibly high RAST numbers, it becomes unlikely that things will change. It was strongly recommended that Alyssa get a medical ID bracelet for times when she is away from me. They aren't often but now that she's getting older, I'm sure that will change. We're looking into this company because the bracelets are so pretty!

Alyssa, as usual, handled things quite well. We're going to start experimenting with soy cheeses so she can have a real pizza. I think that's the only thing we haven't found a good substitute for yet.

After the appointment, we celebrated the girls' good behavior with a trip to Build-A-Bear. Alyssa already has a bunny from her birthday, but she chose a fancy outfit and shoes. Lael and Lauren each chose a creature to stuff without all the accessories. Dinner out and a stroll around a mall with more that 5 stores completed the day.

The girls had some time sledding and playing on Thursday morning before we headed home. Apart from a (very) few tired tears, it was an excellent time away. The girls are did a great job and we were super proud of their behavior. Obviously, we'd rather that Alyssa didn't have any food allergies but in the grand scheme of things - it really isn't anything to complain about. She is a happy, healthy girl! And for that we are so thankful.

Allergist

2010-02-01T08:34:00.002-05:00

It's that time again.

Alyssa has her check-up with her allergist. She has already been through the blood work. Her RAST test results came back as still being strongly positive. We're not sure if she'll have to go through the skin prick tests as well. If we can avoid them, we will.

This isn't our favorite trip of the year but we're still hopeful that she will outgrow some of her allergies one day.

Announcing ...

2010-01-29T07:47:00.001-05:00

Updates:

2010-01-25T07:42:00.001-05:00

- After along ordeal at the airport, the Daby's have their children. Hallelujah!

- My hubby has been knocked flat by a terrible cold. I think cold can be worse than the flu because they just hang on forever!

- Lauren is having some stomach ickies - again. She's doing better today, I think.

- Lael and Alyssa are enjoying our school routine. They both started basketball last week and are really enjoying that!

- It's gray and rainy today. And it's making me tired. And that's all.

the Daby's

2010-01-20T08:49:00.004-05:00

Have you met my Liz? Well, she really isn't my Liz any more. She was my Liz in college. The Liz that led me to the Lord. The Liz that lived with me for three years. The Liz that stood beside me as my maid of honor. She's Josh's Liz now but in a way she'll always be my Liz. (I'm a little possessive that way.) And when any person that I'm attached to is hurting, I get Mama Bear-kinda angry.

Here is a video of my Liz and her Josh speaking to Fox News about what is going on with their kids:

Liz and her Josh are waiting to get their babies home from the deplorable conditions in Haiti. The US government is really dragging their feet and making it difficult for all the adopted parents - many of which had completed the adoption process before the earthquake hit - to get their kids out of danger. The US government can't even promise water or food to these orphans and their caretakers. Where are the millions of dollars in aid going?! Can't even a little of it be used to get these little ones out of danger?

Today, the orphans are going to march through Haiti. Through rough streets and unspeakable sights. Babies. Just so they can get in line at the US Embassy. I'm so disappointed in our government. I know that they are mere men who make mistakes. But really. Babies. With no safe conditions and little food or water.

Please pray for safety for all these orphans today. Pray for the families who are waiting for them. Pray for my Liz and her Josh and their kids - all 4 of them.

Product Review:

2010-01-12T08:10:00.004-05:00

The Leapfrog Didj.

Lael received this for Christmas and I'm sure that it's the coolest Leapfrog toy ever.

Pros:
- Customizable. Lael was able to create her own little character that she uses through each game. There are also customizing kits available with stick-on covers in different colors.

- Focused learning. I can go online and program what types of challenges I think Lael should be getting. Right now we're on multiplication and division. I took out the numbers she hasn't gotten to yet (6,7,8,9) and made sure she's still getting addition review.

- Easy rewards. As Lael plays, she earns "Bitz." When you connect the Didj to a computer, the Bitz are then transferred to a virtual store where Lael can buy super powers or accessories for her character in each game. She LOVES this feature.

- Learning path. When we plug Lael's Didj in so she can download her Bitz, it also downloads her learning path. It tells me what skills she's mastered, what grade level she's functioning at and where she needs to improve.

- Compact. It looks a ton like the popular, handheld gaming systems.

- Fun games. Popular characters such as Spongebob and Hannah Montana would keep most kids interested. Lael got a Super Chicks game that is all about saving the world. Plus it comes with a free downloadable game so right from the get-go kids can be playing.

Cons:
- Games are pricey. We caught Lael's game on clearance at a toy store for $15. For the most part they're about double that. I know that is the going rate for new games but it seems like a lot for a little gaming system.

- Graphics are not the best. My kids don't notice at all, but the graphics are not on par with the newer systems.

- The free game doesn't save your progress. This was incredibly annoying when we first realized it. No matter how far we get into the game, once your character runs out of life you have to start at Level 1. Super annoying.

Overall, this homeschool mom is so happy with the Didj. (I even find myself picking it up to play when I'm bored.) It's become a part of our daily routine for some quiet review. And the best part - there are headphone jacks so Lael can play without disturbing those in the same room as her.

Jackie ... (fb style)

2010-01-10T18:43:00.003-05:00

* is still in her church clothes.
- I really like my new green shirt. I'm still looking for a pair of shoes I like though. I guess I'm a little picky.

* has a family that is SO ready for routine.
- I came down with a terrible cold on Christmas Eve. Then the rest of the family got a stomach bug on Jan. 2. It's been a long two weeks! Now that we're all feeling healthy, I'm noticing the effects of a month of celebrating. It's time to get this train back on the tracks. Attitudes, closets and laundry need to get back in line. I started with laundry. :-) It fights back the least!

* is taking her sweet daughter Alyssa for bloodwork tomorrow. Her yearly check-up with the pediatric allergist is February 3. These results will tell us whether or not she's outgrowing her many food allergies. Tears have already been shed by our little blonde girl over the needles and shots that are coming her way. We're hoping on the 3rd that she'll only have to get between 15 and 20 skin prick tests.

* remembers why I like "home made" so much. I made my first batch of laundry soap since late November yesterday. It cost me about $2 for a 5 gallon bucket. Josh was going to bring home tortillas for our taco dinner last week when he got called back to the office. I made my own. I went shopping in my basement for dinner. We enjoy being prepared and stocking up before winter. December was so filled with shopping and quick runs to the grocery store. I'd forgotten the simple joy of providing meals for my family from our pantry.

* realizes that each age and stage of childhood provides unique challenges. Just when I think maybe we've got a handle on things around here, someone starts wiggling under the weight of authority. We struggle for awhile and then I realize it's a new stage of life, a new phase of childhood. New chores, new daily schedules and a reminder of each person's responsibility to serve rather than be served ... things settle down. Why can't I remember that before the struggle?

And the winner ...

2009-12-31T08:11:00.003-05:00

was determined by a random number generator.

It's Deanna!

Thank you all for entering. I really loved reading about your many blessings.

Deanna, I'll get your fabulous new cookbook to you next week!

Giveaway!

2009-12-29T17:01:00.004-05:00

The first ever Redeemed giveaway!

Remember how I blogged about my wonderfully generous friend from college? She wanted to send me a copy of the Pioneer Woman cookbook? She did! It's awesome!

But so did another wonderfully generous friend from college! With two copies of a great cookbook with beautiful illustrations and clear, well-documented instructions for great recipes I couldn't just let one rot away. With the permission of my wonderfully generous friends, I decided to do a blog contest.

The winner will receive one copy of The Pioneer Woman Cooks: Recipes from an Accidental Country Girl. If you don't live in my area, I will ship it via USPS.

In true PW fashion, please answer the following question to enter:

What was the best gift you received this Christmas?

Mine is a toss-up between my new Nikon L100 and my set of Santoku knives. They are both fantastic, useful and fancy enough to keep me feeling blessed (and a lot spoiled!).

The contest will end on Thursday, December 31 at 8AM. The winner will be randomly chosen. Have fun!

Decade in Review:

2009-12-23T08:12:00.002-05:00

2000-2009 certainly contained some terrible events. Time Magazine has declared it the worst decade ever. But as I look back over the last 10 years, I find lots of joy as well. Thanks to Abby D. for the idea!

2000:
- After a 2 month courtship, Josh proposed to me on February 22. I joyously accepted!
- We were married on July 15.
- We were heavily involved with ministry at our church.
- We discovered we were expecting our first child that September.

2001:
- We welcomed our first lovely girl into the world on June 14 - my 23rd birthday!
- We endured a few months of Josh working away from home during the week. That left me home alone with a newborn. Challenging but we made it!

2002:
- We moved into our first house - we're still here!
- Our whole year pretty much revolved around our very precocious toddler. Lael was quite the entertainment!

2003:
- We discovered we were expecting baby #2 - another girl!
- I continued to choose paint colors and repaint everything. Several times. The kitchen was painted 4 times starting in '03 until we settled on the current colors in maybe '06?
- We welcomed our lovely Alyssa into the world in October. She was our biggest baby to date (10lb. 4oz.) but my easiest labor. Go figure ;)

2004:
- In February, we started our journey with food allergies with our little Alyssa. She hadn't gained much weight since birth (among other health issues) and her doctor was completely stumped. Finally in April, we got her into a pediatric allergist and she was diagnosed. We were SO thankful to finally know what was going on with our baby.
- We felt God telling us to spend a season at Grace Covenant Church in Ogdensburg. It was hard to leave our beloved CFC but we so clearly felt God telling us to go. We both felt it wouldn't be permanent and that made it a bit exciting.
- That summer, Josh began working for himself. It was challenging but we endured and are much stronger for it.

2005:
- Hmm... this year is kind of a blur. We spent a lot of time at the doctors' offices for Alyssa's allergies, asthma and skin issues.
- Having a toddler with food allergies was intense. I did a lot of research and experimenting. Being aware of what she was touching, what Lael touched (and therefore needed her hands washed before she could touch Alyssa) and what was going in Alyssa's mouth was all-consuming.
- Josh continued to run his own small construction business. We look back now and see God's provision in so many ways.

2006:
- I joined a MOMS Club in January and met some great friends. In many ways, MOMS Club kept me sane. Being with other moms helped me so much.
- We spent a week that summer in the Lake George area - visiting with my parents, camping, doing all the tourist stuff. It was our first little vacation and I enjoyed it so much.
- During that vacation, I was battling morning sickness because we were happily expecting another baby!
- Lael began homeschooling that fall and started Friday Program.

2007:
- In March we welcomed our Lauren Jessa. She was the cutest baby!
- Lael excelled in her schooling. Quickly. :-)
- We felt God directing us to go back to CFC. Our season at GCC was done and it was time to go home.
- That November, Josh began working for Cornerstone Services. We felt like huge blessings were just dumped on us. It was a great year.

2008:
- Life with three girls was busy, busy, busy.
- I deleted my entire blog on accident. 3 years of blogs, gone. I was sad.
- We refinished our 100+ year old hardwood floors. It was a lot of work but very worth it.
- Lael was happily homeschooling. Alyssa started kindergarten that fall.
- I taught Friday School kindergarten. It was SO much fun!

2009:
- We vacationed twice this summer - early summer in Cape Cod and late summer in Long Island & NYC. In between we spent every possible day at the lake and river beaches that dot our area. It was the best summer ever, I think.
- I'm teaching Friday School kindergarten again. It really is so fun.
- We were just busy all year, I think. Basketball, CFA, field trips, homeschooling two girls with a very active toddler climbing everywhere, traveling, library time plus swimtime and guitar lessons started in the fall.

2010 looks just as busy from where I stand. It was a great decade. Lots of challenges but so many blessings in return.

How was your decade?

Happenings:

2009-12-21T07:19:00.002-05:00

* Lael and Alyssa participated in a lovely Christmas service at church yesterday. Alyssa sang Christmas carols with her Children's Church class and Lael was in a short musical. She had a little solo and was so nervous! But she did a beautiful job and we are immensely proud of both girls. I have video of the whole morning and am hoping to upload some later today. I might also try the DVD burner on my laptop - I've never used it!

* A friend from college contacted me on Facebook a few days ago. She read of my interest in PW {Have you never read PW's page?! Oh you should. It's quite funny and her recipes are amazing!} and how much I wanted her cookbook. This lovely friend - who I haven't spoken to in nearly 10 years since graduating - is sending me a copy of the PW cookbook!! I'm so flabbergasted but very excited. It looks like a great cookbook.

* The Card Homeschool Academy is officially on Christmas break. I am probably more excited about this than the girls. Well maybe. Right now they are still upstairs, pretending that they are catching a train to New York City. They are some funny girls.

* This week is all about preparations. Cinnamon buns, pierogi, sugar cookies, chocolate-dipped pretzels. Finalizing menus for Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and my parents' visit starting the 26th. One last big cleaning of the house. Maybe some toy purging. Last minute shopping for stocking stuffers.

* I have a lot of wrapping to do. A really lot. Usually, I like to leave some for Christmas Eve but I'm going to have to do some of it before the big night. We decided to do a fancy family dinner for Christmas Eve this year - crab legs, beef tenderloin, roasted vegetables, sparkling grape juice - yum. I'm thinking Christmas dishes, my favorite red tablecloth and candlelight. Then some reading and it's off to bed for our excited kiddos.

* On Christmas morning, no one is allowed downstairs until I go down and get the camcorder ready. The girls are allowed to look at their presents when they come down but no touching! We open our stockings first, while the coffee and cinnamon buns are warming in the kitchen. At the bottom of each stocking is an orange. Everyone goes through their stockings, taking time to enjoy each item and the takes their orange to the table. Breakfast of fresh cinnamon buns and oranges while Josh reads Luke chapter 2 awaits them. Then it begins! We open gifts one person at a time, slowly, happily celebrating our gifts to each other.

Enjoy your family and your traditions as the day approaches. It goes by so fast! All of the sudden we will be talking about getting schedules and eating habits back in line with normal. I aim to enjoy every second of it while Christmas is here.

Realizing:

2009-12-12T07:25:00.002-05:00

-- My daughters are adorable. And super excited for Christmas. Sometimes I think they won't be able to make it all the way to the 25th without bursting.

-- We're blessed in many, many ways. After delivering boxes of food to needy families at Thanksgiving, I have a fresh awareness of the blessing in normal things to me. Turning the heat up because we're chilly. Running to the store to buy some random thing that we've decided we "need." Healthy children. Really, I have nothing to complain about.

-- Believing in Jesus doesn't make us immune from trials and challenges. Even the really bad stuff. It does, however, give us the strength to believe we're going to make it through the bad times. I have a good friend going through some of those bad times. All I can do is pray for her. You can too, if you think of it.

-- Over the last few years, we've spent most of our Christmas days with just our little family. At first it was pretty hard for me. I wanted my house to be filled with people! But now, our quiet Christmas day is probably what I look forward to the most. We play with all the new toys, munch on cookies and snacks, just enjoying that we can be together. There will be times of people-filled celebrations in the weeks to come. But I am really looking forward to Christmas morning - watching the excitement and joy when my daughters see their gifts, opening packages and putting together new toys, Lauren really experiencing Christmas for the first time. It is going to be crazy fun.

Gifts

2009-12-01T08:25:00.003-05:00

I'm finding as my girls get older, it's gets harder and harder to find gifts we think are appropriate and affordable. As much as the electronics stores want to convince my 8 year old she needs her own laptop, I don't think so!

The easy one to buy gifts for is Lauren. Anything that involves a baby doll and she's all in. She has been making her own little 'diaper bags' from purses and totes around the house for weeks now. So when I saw this, I was just about ready to spend the money on it. Because really, how much cuter can you get?!

Much, much cuter.

Then I decided to check Etsy. Have you ever searched for a gift on Etsy? If not, you should. It's an online store for people to sell their handmade wares. Beautiful, creative handmade wares. So I searched for baby doll diaper bags. And found discoknits. Her diaper bags were SO adorable. The only problem was that I really wanted cloth doll diapers for her doll. I didn't need the expense of buying doll diapers every week! I emailed Debs and asked if she'd ever made cloth doll diapers. It couldn't hurt to ask right?! Well, not only did she try it just for me but they diapers are adorable! Lauren's perfect gift arrived beautifully packaged and very quickly. It's soft and beautiful and sweet and just what will make my little girl will squeak with delight on Christmas morning.

So if you have a little person who likes babies and dolls and being a little mommy, check out Debs Etsy shop. If you do order a diaper bag, mention my name and maybe she'll make you cloth diapers too. :)

The Hard Stuff

2009-11-11T07:28:00.002-05:00

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. -- Hebrews 12: 11

I don't think anyone ever fully understands how hard it is to be a parent who must discipline and train their children until they have their own. I know I didn't! Your entire heart and soul is wrapped up is wrapped up in this tiny human that seems to insist on doing the opposite of what you say - and you have to teach them to obey! It's a tough job. And moms, we do the brunt of the work as the adult who is home all day with our little blessings. Tough, tough work. But we can persevere.

I'm not a good disciplinarian or trainer. I'm hotheaded, I get frustrated and impatient and I lose heart. Daily. Sometimes hourly! But God is faithful to forgive me in my sins. My children hear my apologies and learn of God's grace. We move on, we try harder, we inevitably make mistakes and start all over again.

God knows how hard it is to train and discipline. He has to deal with us! And He knows we'll make it. Our children will be a harvest of righteousness. They will be a light to their generation. They will carry the Kingdom of God forward.

Today, parents, do not lose heart. God knows this is hard work and He gives us the grace to complete the task at hand.

Pumpkin

2009-11-09T06:37:00.002-05:00

I've never been a huge pumpkin person. Pumpkin cookies and pumpkin pie was about as far as I got. But this year, I decided to try using more from our pumpkins than just the seeds. Turning fresh pumpkin into pumpkin puree was much easier than I thought it would be.

This site was a huge help. I found that when I cooked the small pie pumpkins, this method worked perfectly. But then I tried to do some larger pumpkins and found that I needed to turn the heat down a bit in the oven. The skins were burning before the inside was tender. Once the pumpkin was cooked and a bit cooled, peeling the meat off the pumpkin skin was so easy. I used a spoon and just scraped it off. I also found that I didn't need to puree the meat. Mashing it with a fork did a fine job at getting the pumpkin to a nice consistency.

So then I decided to make pumpkin soup. I'd had squash soup before and loved it, so why not pumpkin soup, right? But I had no idea there were so many varieties of pumpkin soup! Most of them included heavy cream or milk. This wouldn't work because I wanted to make the soup available for Alyssa - no milk products allowed. So. I just decided to wing it. It was just pumpkin soup right? How can you mess that up?

I had 4 cups of pumpkin and 4 cups of fresh chicken stock from dinner the evening before. To make the soup, first I finely chopped half an onion and two cloves of garlic to saute in a bit of olive oil. I turned the heat down pretty low while they were cooking because I wanted them nice and soft. Then I added the pumpkin and chicken stock. Mashed that all together and let it come to a simmer.

Then it was time for seasonings. I decided to sprinkle in some chili powder and cinnamon with salt and pepper. After that cooked for a bit, I tasted it to see if I was on the right track. Eureka! The cinnamon and chili powder was perfect together. I added it a little more of both as well as some allspice and a bit more salt. To sweeten it, I added a blub of fresh maple syrup and stirred. Then it just simmered away until my friend and her adorable boys arrived. Everyone loved it! Well, except Alyssa. :-)

Alyssa!

2009-10-31T06:16:00.000-04:00

Happy birthday to my Alyssa. She is a sweet, happy, funny girl and I'm so blessed to be her mom!

three

2009-10-27T07:50:00.003-04:00

**Loving**

- Homemade,whole wheat toast topped with peanut butter and sliced banana. No one else in my house appreciates such delicacies.

- The crisp yellow leaves that cover my front yard.

- How a pot of simmering water, cinnamon sticks and cloves can make my whole house smell fantastic. It adds some moisture to the air and has to be better than canned air fresheners - although I do love my Febreze Pumpkin Harvest.

*Liking*

- How our weekly schedule is busy but becoming an achievable routine.

- Good, strong, hot coffee. 'Nuff said.

- That my lessons for Friday Program are already planned through Christmas. I have to print out coloring sheets and gather books on Thursday evening, but the big stuff is done!

Not Liking

- That plans for holiday visits are so hard to plan.

- That Lauren can climb the stairs faster and quieter than a mouse. She's upstairs and into trouble before anyone even knows she's missing.

- My mums have died. They're still on the porches, surrounded by pumpkins, but looking so droopy and pathetic. Once the mums die, there are no more flowers until spring. Bummer.

My Sanguine Girl

2009-10-21T15:16:00.002-04:00

Me: (after taking Lauren through her bedtime routine and tucking her in with all her blankets, animals and babies) Okay Lauren, I love you. Take a good nap!

Lauren: (bursts out giggling and clapping) I'm SO excited!

Me: What are you excited about? (totally lost.)

Lauren: It's nap time!!

I've not gotten that reaction before! Only from my little burst of sunshine :)

Bounty

2009-10-19T13:14:00.002-04:00

At our church, we're blessed with some great preaching. Yesterday's message was about choosing to be thankful. To remember - on purpose - the good stuff, the pleasant memories, the blessings. It was a great message and a great time of year for it.

Up here - waaaay north - there are two types of people. Those who start grumbling about winter as soon as there is one chilly August night and those who start looking for pumpkins and cider on September 1. I'm in that crazy, season-loving, bring on winter group. (I reserve the right to occasionally grumble about snow in March or April.) But one of the things I love about this season of transition is the amazing bounty of fruits and vegetables to be found locally.

Last year I started canning and preserving food. It has turned into a bit of an obsession but once you see a shelf lined with gleaming jars of jewel-colored deliciousness - you're hooked. It also helps when you can run to the basement and grab a jar of applesauce during a raging snow storm instead of having to run to the grocery store.

This year, we missed out on two of last years favorites - dill pickles and pickled jalapenos. But we still have our shelves full and for that I am thankful. Our total this year - before we started eating it! - was:
6 quarts pear-sauce
10 quarts sliced pears
14 quarts sliced peaches
14 quarts crushed tomatoes
6 quarts of salsa
A lot of strawberry jam (maybe 18 pints?)

Plus 7 bags of chopped tomatos and 8 quarts of corn in the freezer. Today I'm plowing through our bushel of 20 oz. apples and freshly remembering why I loved them so much last year. They're huge and it makes for a lot less peeling. I'm hoping to get 12 quarts of applesauce.

Today I'm thankful for the provision that God gives us and the ability to preserve it.

fall

2009-10-14T08:47:00.001-04:00

I love autumn.

That's all.

5 Things

2009-09-29T16:26:00.002-04:00

I was tagged by her to make a list of the top 5 things that make homeschooling easier for me.

1. Our curriculum. A) It's multi-age so Lael and Alyssa do the same geography, science, Bible and art lessons every day. B) It's completely preplanned and organized for me. I have to make sure we have supplies for projects, but even that is listed for me. C) It's easy to teach, fun and very informative. Alyssa correctly defined biome yesterday. That made me happy.

2. My planner. I have space to write in grade-specific language and math plans for each child (up to 4), every day. There is a blank daily schedule in 30 minute increments, a month-at-a-glance calendar plus space for weekly priorities, monthly expenses, weekly menus, semester goals, field trips, reading lists and my personal favorite - perforated shopping lists. So each Friday I look at our activities for the coming week, write in our school plans and make my menu according to those plans. Then my shopping list is right there for me to fill in, tear out and head to the store. I highly recommend it to any homeschooling mom.

3. A well stocked pantry. I don't know about you but things get ugly fast around here when no one can find snacks. If I keep my pantry well stocked, it makes my whole day run more smoothly. If there isn't a snack for the week already made, I can make one or assign a daughter to make one quickly. This is a great jumping point for a stocked pantry.

4. A cleaning chart. Many moms swear by Saturday cleaning days. I see how that would be really beneficial to an effective week. But for me, well ... I'm picky. a little. We work off a daily cleaning schedule. Lael, Alyssa and I all have assigned rooms to clean each day. The girls have a clipboard with exact instructions on how I expect each room to be cleaned. Each day before Josh get home (ideally) we do a quick sweep of the house to tidy up, run the vacuum and make everything neat and peaceful. It helps transition our day from school/play time to family/ Dad down time. It helps me let go a bit about messes during school time because I know we will clean soon. (wow, that really makes me sound crazy.)

5. My devotional Bible. I'm not the morning person I used to be. But, it's pretty much a guarantee that one my girls will be up by 6am. They will all be up and running by 6:30-7am. Mornings are tough for me but I found that skipping even the quickest of devotions was really affecting me. These devotions are short but poignant. I can read through one and have some prayer time while the girls watch PBS before breakfast. The best part is that the devotions are divided into character qualities. Right now I'm reading through the Peace study and really enjoying it.

Recipe:

2009-09-28T11:42:00.002-04:00

Creamed Chicken.

Sounds kinda gross, right? Well it's not. It is fantastic, delicious, cheap, hearty and easy to make. I make creamed chicken as a base for chicken tetrazzini, chicken pot pie, chicken and rice casserole, chicken and broccoli ... you get the idea. Anything bubbly and warm that has chicken in it! Also, this recipe is a substitute for all those white and red Cream of ______ soup concentrates at the grocery store. They are loaded with lots of things I can't pronounce. Yuck. And really, what on earth has that consistency? It's a little frightening! I stopped buying them quite awhile ago.

I'm terrible at writing out recipes because I rarely measure anything. But here goes:

Put your desired amount of chicken in a pan and cover with water. You can use bone-in or boneless. Our family of 5 big eaters is well fed with 2-3 pieces of chicken. (That is where the cheap comes in to play!) Sometimes I add celery, onions and garlic to the water. Sometimes I don't. Let this simmer until the water is looking chicken broth-like and the chicken is cooked all the way through. I'm guessing this takes around 30-45 minutes. If you are starting with frozen chicken, figure on an hour. Leave the pot uncovered and the heat on medium-medium high.

Remove the chicken, and pour cooking water into a big bowl. If you added veggies, strain them out. Set aside.

Put the pan back on the heat and add some oil. You can use coconut, extra-virgin, canola, etc. Saute some diced onions and garlic. While this is cooking, dice the cooked chicken. Add to pan. Sometimes I add my seasonings during this step. I always add some poultry seasoning, salt and pepper now. Mix it through.

This is the part that takes a little practice. Or a real recipe. :-) Sprinkle flour over the onion-garlic-chicken mixture. I usually use about two heaping serving spoons of flour. Mix this thoroughly until the flour takes on a nice light brown color and it's sticking to the veggies. If you need a splash more oil to get everything incorporated, go for it. You want the chicken and veggies to have a coating of light brown flour but nothing should smell burned. Keep the heat on medium.

Now start slowly adding in the reserved cooking water. It should still be warm so this will work together fast. Add it slowly. Very. Slowly. A couple of cups at a time. Don't stop stirring until everything is thick and bubbly. I have a pan like this and when I get all the broth in there, thickened with veggies it comes close to filling the pan. If you run out of broth, use milk. Turn down on low and let this simmer.

Now pause.
What are you going to make?

Chicken tetrazzini? Flavor with some poultry seasoning, salt, pepper, parsley and cheese. Mix with a pound of cooked pasta. Pour into casserole dish and bake until crusty on top and bubbly.

Chicken pot pie? Add some frozen veggies, poultry seasoning, s&p according to taste. Let bubble while you make a biscuit topping. Pour into casserole dish, top with biscuit dough, bake.

Chicken and broccoli? I think you have the idea by now. This is an easy, affordable way to feed a hungry crowd something hearty. So try it! Don't forget to taste your creamed chicken mixture for seasoning. Especially if you're used to the condensed soups, this is much less salty. You'll want to make sure it's not too bland for you.

more peace

2009-09-24T08:00:00.001-04:00

You will keep him in perfect peace,
Whose mind is stayed on You,
Because he trusts in You.

~ Isaiah 26:3

Fall food

2009-09-23T15:11:00.004-04:00

Isn't fall food the best?! You know, those favorite meals that make the entire house smell fantastic. I love that kind of food! We're having one of my favorites today. Thanks to my planner, I've gotten back into menu planning after a long summer break. (Because really, in our house menu planning in the summer isn't worth it. We just rotate hamburgers, chicken, leftovers, steak. Sad, I know.) It's been nice to have some predictability to my afternoons and my grocery shopping.

So, I'm making a breakfast casserole today. Since we are not a cottage-cheese-eating family and somewhere in our wedding vows I promised to put meat in every meal, I had to go searching for a good, hearty casserole. Here is what I found:

Sausage Breakfast Casserole

1 lb. breakfast sausage, sauteed and crumble.
1 t. mustard powder
1/2 t. salt
4 eggs
2 c. milk
6 slices of bread, toasted and cubed
8 oz. sharp cheddar, grated

- Let sausage cool completely after cooking.
- Mix mustard powder, salt, eggs and milk in medium bowl.
- Add bread cubes, sausage and cheese. Stir well and be sure all the bread is coated.
- Pour into a 9x13 baking dish, cover and refrigerate up to 24 hours.
- Preheat over to 350*.
- Bake for 45-60 minutes, covered tightly with foil.
- Reduce oven to 325*, uncover and cook for 20-25 minutes until set.

But I can never leave recipes alone. That's just not fun for me. Here's what I'm going to do to it:

- Saute diced onion and garlic with sausage. Add in some frozen, diced green peppers.
- Use 6 eggs to ensure some leftovers.
- Use extra cheese, to sprinkle some on top. Everything deserves extra cheese.
- Mix it all in a greased 9x13 baking dish because it will save me some dishes.
- Bake it right after I mix it because I got sidetracked late this morning and didn't get the casserole made yet. It still tastes good. I've done this before. Apparently I get sidetracked a lot.

Autumn

2009-09-21T07:16:00.002-04:00

My favorite season descended quickly upon us and now we're knee deep in fall busyness. Some highlights:

- Josh and I decided that it was time to add some extracurricular activities to Lael's week. Things got a bit hairy for a while but we've finally decided on what works best for us and what we're comfortable with. It will still mean more running around for me but they are all activities she enjoys and we think will benefit her in the long run.

- Lael asked to volunteer at out local library and help with the toddler story hour. We love, love, love that this is what she wanted to do with her time and happily agreed, as did our librarian.

- We're hoping to get our sporty Lael into a special non-credit program at a local college. It is a swim time for homeschooled children with swim lessons mixed in. We're very excited about her continuing one of her favorite summer activities for awhile.

- Alyssa is our social butterfly and loves to spend time with friends. She doesn't mind at all that we want her to spend another year focusing on her schooling and being at home. She and Lauren are inseparable most days. They play babies and pioneers and ant village (complete with a huge, living-room-wide tent) and read books together. They are very fun little girls.

- One class Alyssa will be going to in is Friendship Clubhouse. We always start out with the intent of getting our girls involved in this ministry at our church but have been lax in following through. Now that Alyssa will be 6 next month and she can join Lael, we are going to make a strong effort to get them there.

- I am almost through with our canning season. Even though our bushels of fruit came in late (and at the worst possible week for me), we've made it through. Our shelves are filling up nicely.

- Our enrichment program hosted a one day homeschool seminar this past weekend. I was totally blessed, encouraged and challenged by the sessions and workshops. And I was quite happy that I got through my sharing without making a complete fool of myself. All the workshops and main sessions will be available online to download for those unable to make it to the seminar.

- Friday School will be starting soon and we're all looking forward to that. I'm very blessed to be able to teach the kindergarten class - they are so much fun!

- I am hoping to get reviews of our curriculum and my planner soon. I am really enjoying both of them. And now I must get moving with my day! My planner tells me it is about time for breakfast.

My latest purchase

2009-09-11T15:39:00.002-04:00

Well, my latest purchase apart from bananas and cheese ...

A Danica Dunphey original .

Quote:

2009-09-10T13:21:00.002-04:00

As Alyssa and Lauren were looking at the new American Girl catalog:

Alyssa - Lauren, do you like these baby beds?

Lauren - Yep, my baby would absolutely fit in one of those!

Just to remind you all - Lauren is 2 and a half. Absolutely? You can tell she spends lots of time with her big sisters!

Psalm 27

2009-09-05T07:00:00.002-04:00

My devotional Bible led me to Psalm 27 this morning. What a great way to start the day.

And with the news that my favorite singer is making a comeback, her song Peace came to mind. It's a beautiful song and captures Psalm 27 so perfectly.

He is my Light and my Salvation
Whom have I to fear
In His secret place I'll hide and pray
That I might hear a simple word
O, how I would have despaired
If You had not come found me there
I can lean against You throne and find my Peace
Find my Peace
And when my enemies draw near I pray that they will find
That I'm protected and secure
All tempests He will bind with a mighty word
O, how I would have despaired
If You had not come found me there
I can lean against You throne and find my Peace
Find my Peace
He is my Light and my Salvation whom have I to fear?

The Last Summer Trip

2009-09-02T06:53:00.004-04:00

Our last summer trip started several days earlier than planned. After processing and freezing 4 dozen ears of corn, I remembered to call my mom and ask about the tomato farm near her house. (That was on Saturday afternoon.) Turns out it was the first weekend they were allowing picking and they only were open on the weekends. Hmm. With our schedule, that would mean we weren't free to go go tomatos for 3 weeks. I was afraid we'd miss out because so many people had lost their tomatos to blight and would be buying them - just like us. So the girls and I were off. Sunday we picked 5 bushels of tomatos and 1 of eggplant/green peppers.

All day Monday and Tuesday we peeled, chopped, pureed and bagged lots of tomatos. 2 of the 5 were mine and I brought home SO many tomatos. I was very glad to be done. Wednesday, the girls stayed with my parents and I came home to get Josh. The big trip was almost here! Thursday we drove to Long Island. The weather was beautiful when we got there and the girls were able to play in my aunt's pool all evening.

Friday we went to the Atlantis Marine World Aquarium. The girls got to see sharks up close, feed stingrays and sand sharks, walk through a bay filled with crabs and get little airbrushed tattoos. It was a great place. There will be photos of that day on my Flickr. That evening, my aunt had a barbecue with some family and friends. The girls had a blast, were polite and well-mannered - happy times all around.

Saturday finally arrived. The original plan was to go to the Museum of Natural History then the American Girl store. We realized that there wouldn't be enough time to do the Museum justice when we saw the train schedule. The decision was made to go to FAO Schwartz and Rockefeller Center instead. We arrived in Penn Station, loaded into a minivan cab (pics to come - it was pretty squished!) and headed off for the girls first look at New York City. After a stop at a hot dog cart for a snack, we were off to the toy store.

We had a great time in FAO Schwartz. I couldn't get over all the cool toys. Make your own Muppets?! How fun! But my girls headed straight for the Barbies.

(Outside FAO with a toy soldier)

Now before I go any further, you need to understand that my aunt loves to shop. More than any person I know. And she has sons. Her sons have sons. Last week, her daughter-in-law finally had a girl but shopping for a 2 week old isn't nearly as fun as watching 3 chatty girls run through isles of pink. My girls were highly spoiled but thankful and polite the whole time.

Okay so at FAO the girls were told they could each get one thing. Well. One thing turned out to be a new collection of Barbie dolls and clothes. We then realized why we wanted my dad and Josh to come. Sharing the memory was great but we needed them to carry bags and boxes! After a stroll through the city, we stopped at the Rock Center Cafe for some coffee. We took lots of photos of the gold statues near the ice rink, so the girls will remember at Christmas time that they had ice cream right there.

Then it was time. American Girl. The store was amazing - 4 stories. The cafe was beautiful. They catered to Alyssa and her allergies, making sure she felt special and included. Then they shopped. Oh my. Molly and Felicity are now sleeping on beautiful beds, in pajamas that match Lael and Alyssa. Too cute. Lauren also got a bunny robe and matching slippers for her and her baby doll.

(Daddy and Papa with some of the bags)

After that we went to Times Square and checked out the sights. The girls loved it. Dinner at Ellen's Stardust Diner, followed by a stroll back through Times Square all lit up. It was perfect. We all wanted them to see the city lit up and they did! The ride home on the train was a little hairy with trying to get all the bags on and off, keeping Lauren quiet and trying to settle the girls down.

Sunday morning, we were able to swim a little more and then head back to Nana and Papa's. By Monday when it was time to come home, we were all exhausted. I think everyone is still recovering a bit from all the late nights and excitement.

There will be pictures on my Flickr later today and more coming soon. Now I'm off to prep for a Moms Cadre small group meeting. Later today, Lael starts her guitar lessons. It is September! Off we go.

Kitchen

2009-08-22T11:21:00.002-04:00

This is the most creative, adorable thing EVER. I think my girls need one of these. :-)

summer

2009-08-20T22:51:00.002-04:00

It's late.

For a mom with three kids who rarely sleep through the night or past 6:30am, it's really late.

But it's muggy and still and I don't sleep well in such conditions. Everyone is sleeping. Even the dog. I'm just not tired yet.

Maybe it was finally ordering our curriculum and realizing that since I'd found some math books for a great price here, I had budget room to order this also. A new planner! Only a home school mom could get so excited over such a thing.

Maybe it was realizing that our big trip to Long Island and NYC is less than a week away. If I think about it too long, my mind starts swirling with packing lists and hostess gift ideas.

Maybe it was watching part of a good preseason game. Our team was up by 10 at the half. Peyton scored two great touchdowns. Hopefully that is a sign of things to come.

Maybe it's because I have ideas running through my head for this year's kindergarten class at Friday Program. It's not going to be as easy as I was hoping, but very fun.

Maybe it was realizing that my last 5 gallon batch of laundry soap is still going strong. Or that I'm out of granola for breakfast tomorrow. Or that I haven't baked bread in a really long time - I should probably get on that. Or that the lawn still needs to be mowed. Or that I didn't hear back from the Girl Scout people...

Or that it's humid.
Because it is. Quite. Humid.
Ick.

Forward march

2009-08-12T07:56:00.003-04:00

176. The four seasons and their never-ending cycle. I like change.

177. Rearranging furniture. Even if its just a storage unit and a table - it's fresh, clean and new. It's one of those things that makes me take a good, long, deep breath.

178. Books. I really like books. My littlest girl likes books too. So much that I moved all "her" books to a special spot, just for her. She reads to her little baby on her lap. (I need to try and sneak a video of her doing this. It is precious.)

179. Green trees that are starting to show a tinge of orange and yellow.

180. Talking with a friend who thinks like I do. It makes me feel like maybe I'm not totally crazy. :-)

(and now for the food section of the list ... )

181. Granola with sliced banana and yogurt.

182. Snap Pea crisps. Oh my. Delicious. They make me thankful for a snack item that is healthy and doesn't taste like cardboard. And they're $1.90 at our local health food store. Perfect!

Gideon

2009-08-10T08:21:00.003-04:00

The angel of the LORD came and sat down under the oak in Ophrah that belonged to Joash the Abiezrite, where his son Gideon was threshing wheat in a winepress to keep it from the Midianites. When the angel of the LORD appeared to Gideon, he said, "The LORD is with you, mighty warrior."
"But sir," Gideon replied, "if the LORD is with us, why has all this happened to us? Where are all his wonders that our fathers told us about when they said, 'Did not the LORD bring us up out of Egypt?' But now the LORD has abandoned us and put us into the hand of Midian."
The LORD turned to him and said, "Go in the strength you have and save Israel out of Midian's hand. Am I not sending you?"
"But Lord , " Gideon asked, "how can I save Israel? My clan is the weakest in Manasseh, and I am the least in my family."
The LORD answered, "I will be with you, and you will strike down all the Midianites together." ~ Judges 6:11- 16

What peace to know that even when we feel completely inadequate, unworthy and useless - the Lord is with us to move forward together.

Have I mentioned before how hard I find it to concentrate on grocery shopping with three busy girls in tow? Sometimes I have no idea what I bought until I get home and unpack my bags.

Now I can go grocery shopping. He is with me. :-)

Yes.

2009-08-04T09:00:00.003-04:00

It was blight.

All that was left by 7:30 am:

Blight?

2009-08-03T11:02:00.003-04:00

Does anyone know anything about blight?

Some of our tomatos are starting to rot on the vine.

One plant has completely fallen over and is wilted. I'm really afraid that our tomatos are infected and they'll all be junk. We have some really loaded plants. But they're starting to wilt from the bottom up. Ugh.

Cape Cod

2009-07-24T08:43:00.002-04:00

Was this really only a month ago? It feels like a year ago since we were in Cape Cod.

July

2009-07-20T07:38:00.002-04:00

I have been terrible about posting here lately. In July of 2008, I posted 20 times. 20! This month, I'm sorry to say we're down to 2.

Things here have been busy. Here's a quick recap:

- The girls and I were in a Fourth of July parade with Josh. He drove a company truck, Alyssa sat on the float and waved, Lael handed business cards out and Lauren sat in her stroller waving a flag. It was fun. A bit exhausting but fun.

- We've not had any traveling to do all month so our family focus has been getting hearts and attitudes back to where they should be. Any parent that has had to pull the train back on the tracks, so to speak, knows how difficult this can be. We keep our minds on the future, knowing that our children will be better off having had parents that taught them to be selfless rather than parents who were their buddies.

- The summer cold has run it's course through our house. Poor Lauren is now on her second round of dreaded antibiotics due to an ear infection that won't quit. Two weeks ago, she had a terrible night of crying and wiggling in pain. I got her right to the doctor's office in the morning only to be told I was lucky her ear drum hadn't popped because it was so swollen. Apparently the course of amoxicillin did nothing. She was in so much pain last night that I took her to the ER. I couldn't stand to think of how much her ear must hurt. Thanks to a quick-working ER and a 24-hour Wal-mart, we were home around 1:30AM with more antibiotics and Motrin. Hopefully she recovers quickly.

- This coming weekend is our last slow weekend before the last of the summer craziness begins. The girls has been faithfully participating in activities with our 4H club for a year now and want to enter exhibits into the county fair. So August 1st will find me in completely new territory. I've never entered anything into a fair, let alone several things along with a booth for our club. Then that evening, my small group is meeting at the home of a woman from church for a special night of desserts and sharing in her garden. It should be fantastic. After that, every weekend (save one which I'm sure we'll need to recoup!) is loaded. A birthday party for my grandfather, a wedding and then the last hurrah - our trip to Long Island for the Afternoon Tea at the American Girl store.

Then it's back to reality!

Cherish

2009-07-06T13:06:00.002-04:00

The days are long but the years are short.

It was with that quote in mind that I asked a good friend to share at my small group meeting this past week. She is the mother of seven boys and an amazing example of a Godly mother. All those in attendance were blessed by her wisdom and honesty. She shared with us about cherishing days. Every day. Even those long, rainy, muggy, the-kids-are-climbing-the-walls days. It was fantastic.

One thing that really stuck out to me was her reference to Jochebed. I'm not a Bible scholar by any means so this fresh perspective was lovely to hear. Jochebed was the mother of Moses. Here is part of her story in Exodus 2:1-10.

And a man of the house of Levi went and took as wife a daughter of Levi. So the woman conceived and bore a son. And when she saw that he was a beautiful child, she hid him three months. But when she could no longer hide him, she took an ark of bulrushes for him, daubed it with asphalt and pitch, put the child in it, and laid it in the reeds by the river’s bank. And his sister stood afar off, to know what would be done to him.

Then the daughter of Pharaoh came down to bathe at the river. And her maidens walked along the riverside; and when she saw the ark among the reeds, she sent her maid to get it. And when she opened it, she saw the child, and behold, the baby wept. So she had compassion on him, and said, “This is one of the Hebrews’ children.”
Then his sister said to Pharaoh’s daughter, “Shall I go and call a nurse for you from the Hebrew women, that she may nurse the child for you?”
And Pharaoh’s daughter said to her, “Go.” So the maiden went and called the child’s mother. Then Pharaoh’s daughter said to her, “Take this child away and nurse him for me, and I will give you your wages.” So the woman took the child and nursed him. And the child grew, and she brought him to Pharaoh’s daughter, and he became her son. So she called his name Moses, saying, “Because I drew him out of the water.”

Jochebed hid Moses because all Hebrew boys were being killed at birth. Jochebed knew her son was special and managed to hide him for three months before sending him down the river. Can you imagine her emotion during those three months?! Knowing that the time would come when she would have to send him on to whatever the Lord had for him. Every mother comes to that point but she had to do that with her infant! Then by a miracle of the Lord, Jochebed was chosen to be the nursemaid for her own baby. She once again knew that the time would come when she would have to walk away from her son. Think of how much she must have cherished and adored every moment with him. Every second. For a few short years. Then off he was again.

That's how brief our time with our children really is. In the blink of an eye, they will be grown and moving on. It's hard for me to believe I have an 8 year old. It seems like just yesterday we brought her home during the hottest June in recent history. And I know that it will feel like tomorrow but in reality 8 more years will pass and she'll be starting to drive.

Cherish your days. It's hard, stressful, exhausting and at times frustrating. But they are worth it. Swallow the frustration. Put aside the dirty dishes. Cherish your days. Make a memory. We never know what tomorrow will bring.

quiet

2009-06-26T08:37:00.003-04:00

Sorry it's been so quiet over here. The weather has been glorious. We've spent days at the beach - the girls are all tanned and bleached blonde now.

It's also strawberry season. I've got 9 pints of jam, 2 bags each of sliced, whole and diced strawberries frozen and 12 more quarts to go!

Our garden is doing amazingly well. Flowers are already blooming on tomatos, cucumbers and peppers. The green beans didn't take so we'll be replanting that tomorrow.

Other than that, it's just a typical summer around here. Busy, busy, busy!

Vaca

2009-06-19T21:01:00.003-04:00

We're home!
Lots more photos here.

June in pictures

2009-06-12T21:03:00.002-04:00

Lael and Alyssa in their swimsuits after a day of playing in the sprinkler. This is their little tent Lael slept outside in. Alyssa wanted to try her turn sleeping outside later that week but it was too cold. Josh set it up in the toy room for her. She enjoyed her little treat very much. (And it was easier on me!)

Our 4H club volunteered with the Canton Garden Club. The girls and I did some planting a few weeks ago. Here is most of the club members at a local cemetery monument. They worked hard weeding, raking and mulching. The older woman who runs the garden club was very blessed.
We also took a field trip to the Almanzo Wilder Homestead. Lael is on the far left above. She and two of her friends dressed in their prairie girl clothes and enjoyed pretending the day away. It was a beautiful day and we all had a great time.

Lael will be 8 on Sunday. Here she is in her prairie girl clothes, waiting to leave for our field trip. She is such a great helper that sometimes I think it's easy to forget she's still a little girl. We decided that for her birthday Josh and I would take her shopping. Just her and us. A good friend is watching the other girls (which is quite an undertaking with Alyssa's allergies). We're going to lunch here since we can't go there when we have Alyssa with us because they throw peanuts. She is SO excited.
And here is our beautiful kindergarten graduate! She had a great time with her friends and going up on stage. Josh treated us all to ice cream and sno-cones afterwards which is her favorite thing!

So that's what we've been up to. It seems like a lot considering it's only half way through the month. The next photos you see on here will be of us on vacation! Bye!